Still A Better Love Story Than Twilight
by kb9vcn
Summary: Just another negitoro yuri vampire AU fic. Open-ended serial, to be updated as time allows.
1. First Blood

This contains mild adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku Hatsune— college freshman, varsity cheerleader, community volunteer, and all-around outgoing and vivacious young woman— was trying to go to sleep early. She had a full day of classes tomorrow, with cheerleading practice after, and she wanted to be fully rested and at her cheerful best.

Her residence-hall room was dark and still. Miku's room-mate (and life-long best friend) Gumi was spending another late night at the college library. ("NERD!," Miku had said to Gumi with teasing affection as Gumi left, which earned Miku an equally affectionate raised middle finger from Gumi.)

And the hallway outside her unlocked and open door was quiet. Miku (an above-average student herself) and Gumi had enrolled in an honors program, and their floor had extended quiet hours through the week.

But Miku was having trouble sleeping because of the late autumn heat. Her room faced west, and even the massive residence-hall HVAC system could not keep up with the heat of the sun that was not at all obstructed by the yellowed vertical blinds limply hanging over her window. Miku had left both the window and the door open, but there was little air flow between them.

The sun was setting late, especially from the view of an upper-floor window and an unobstructed western horizon. Miku threw back her bedsheets, tossed and turned, and sighed in relief when the sun finally set.

A few minutes later... Miku was no longer alone.

A black shape seemingly glided into the room, and stood at Miku's lower bunk-bed bedside. It stood still and silent, watching Miku sleep, as if it were waiting for the right moment... or willing something to happen.

And it happened. Miku turned again in her sleep. She was wearing an oversized T-shirt, and as she turned, her body pulled it down, exposing her lower neck and shoulder with the soft glow of a thin film of sweat.

The black shape began to lean in. Slowly at first, and then faster. Its eyes, previously hidden in the shadows of a soft hood, glowed red. It fell to Miku's shoulder with a soft hiss.

And the silence was broken by a piercing female shriek.

* * *

Miku, unharmed and now fully awake, sat up in bed, holding back the black shape's head by one delicate ear. She turned on a small bedside lamp with her free hand.

"Ow ow ow ow ow ow," the black shape said. Its hood fell back to reveal the long soft pink hair of a very beautiful young woman, perhaps a few years older than Miku.

"Excuse me," Miku said, "but what do you think you're doing?"

The woman rolled her eyes, which had faded from blood red to a deep blue. "Why, I am performing the 'Hawaiian War Chant'... what does it **look** like I am doing?"

"Aggravated assault?" Miku said.

"Ow ow ow," the woman said again. "The only assault committed in this room has been against my own person. Would you please release my ear? If you would, I promise to back away from you."

Miku reluctantly released the offending ear. The woman stood back and up, rubbing the side of her head. "Thank you," she said. "How did you catch my ear? No human has ever caught me before."

"Don't know, really. Quick reflexes, I guess," Miku said modestly. "No weirdo has ever tried to molest me before, either."

"I was **not** trying to molest you," the woman said in a slightly offended tone. "I was **only** trying to drink some of your blood."

"Oh, that's **much** less serious," Miku said with a smirk. "You know, it's rude to try to drink someone's blood without asking permission."

"I have **not** had a great deal of positive response," the woman said dryly, "to my requests to drink even a small amount of a stranger's blood."

"You haven't tried asking **me**," Miku said.

The woman raised one eyebrow. "...should I?"

"Go for it," Miku said with an encouraging smile.

"Very well," the woman said. "May I drink a small amount of your blood?"

Miku swallowed heavily and gathered up all of her nerve. "...yes," she said. "But on one condition."

The woman frowned. "You would ask a boon of me? I do not usually contract with mortals merely for one feeding. What would you have me do?"

"I wanna take you out on a date," Miku said earnestly. "Are you free this Friday? Say, six o'clock?"

The woman stared at Miku for a long silent moment. "... **what**." she finally said flatly. "**Why**?"

"Three reasons," Miku said. "One: You're obviously interested in me, or at least, in my shoulder. Two: As for **me**, I'm gay as a daffodil, and I can't see much of you in all that black clothing— but from what I can see? You **fine**. And three: I'm OK with making out a little bit, but I don't do one-night stands. And I haven't dated since high school, and I'd like to get to know you."

"...I see," the woman said, still taken aback. "Pardon my surprise. I am unused to consent from my victims, let alone any interest in seeing me again."

"You seem like a nice person, now that we've talked a little bit," Miku said. "You really should just talk to people before you try to go all weird on them. Oh, and you probably shouldn't refer to them as your 'victims'. That doesn't exactly suggest a mutually beneficial relationship."

"You might have a point," the woman admitted. "Very well. I agree to your boon. I shall return to your room this Friday at six o'clock, to spend the evening with you as you please."

Miku helpfully pulled her shirt down, exposing her shoulder again. "And in **that** case," she said, "I agree to your macking on me."

The woman hissed softly again, as if she were breathing out heavily. "Such an exquisite collarbone," she said out loud to herself.

"Pervert," Miku said. "Try not to leave any hickeys high on my neck, OK?... Oh, wow! Nice fangs! Did you— OW! HEY! You really BIT me! Are you CRAZY? Oh no, I'm bleeding! Oh no...

"Oh... Ooohhhhh... Oh, **yesssss**..."

After a moment that seemed to last for hours, the woman stood back and up again. She modestly held a hand in front of her mouth, thoughtfully sparing Miku the sight of her own blood. "...well?" she asked expectantly. "As you young people say: 'Was it good for you?'"

Miku was still breathing heavily. "WHAT was THAT?" she gasped. "That was... uh... well... what **was** that?" She raised a hand to her neck, and found that the bite wound had already closed.

The woman licked the last of the blood from her teeth, and then smiled sweetly. "It is an agreeable side-effect for both of us. When I must take blood by force, the effect serves to calm the vi— er, human, and inhibit her fear, so that I need not fight her as I feed. But in the rare case where a human gives consent, as you did? With no fear to overcome, the effect becomes one of overwhelming pleasure, bordering on the erotic. Or so I have been told."

"Oh, **wow**," Miku said hazily. "You're a vampire!"

The woman face-palmed. "I had **assumed** that you had already arrived at that conclusion... Tell me, girl. If you had not realized I was a vampire, then exactly what did you think I was doing?"

"I thought you were just a socially awkward live-action role-player grad-student who was sneaking around campus, looking for innocent freshmen to hit on," Miku said. "I knew a girl back in high school who was into that kind of stuff. I heard that, instead of kissing guys at parties, she would put in fake fangs and nibble on their necks. But she was straight, darn it, and she never made a move on me. She was a real goth cutie."

"I see," the woman said again. "It seems our meeting was quite fortuitous. In addition to being a lonely and adventurous homosexual, you also have something of an unfulfilled vampire fetish."

"When you put it that way," Miku said, "you make it sound like **I'm** the weirdo here. Lots of girls are hot for vampires these days, you know?"

The woman giggled. "I find that unlikely," she said. "But I must apologize, for I have taken rather more blood from you than I first intended. I should go, so that you may rest. We can talk at length after I return for your date."

Miku fell back in her bed. "Um, are you really OK with that? Sorry, I didn't really know what I was asking... and from whom I was asking it..."

"I have already agreed to your boon," the woman said solemnly. "I am now bound to honor your wishes, on pain of my own existence. And even if I were not so bound... you are a most intriguing young woman, Miku Hatsune."

"How do you know my name?" Miku asked nervously. "Can you read my mind?"

"Not exactly," the woman said, "although I do have many psychic abilities. But rather, I **can** read the student ID you left on your desk."

"Oh," Miku said. "Hey, wait! Don't go yet! What's **your** name?"

"Forgive me," the woman said, "but I am not yet comfortable with revealing my identity. Perhaps I will share my name with you later. Sleep well, Miku. I sincerely look forward to seeing you again."

Miku watched the woman leave her room. And then, she stared up at the bottom of Gumi's bunk-bed, and giggled to herself. _Gumi is __**not**__ going to believe __**this**_, Miku thought.

_Gumi is __**not**__ going to believe that I got a __**date**__ with an __**older woman**__!_

* * *

Luka smiled to herself as she easily made her exit from the residence hall unseen. She had taken her fill of blood, and she had some pleasant thoughts to ponder.

She had long ago been invited to enter every residence hall on campus, as well as every lecture hall and administrative building, and she came and went as she pleased. The campus buildings also had many convenient storage rooms and hidden spaces for her to hide from the sun during the day.

The college campus, and the small city and campus town surrounding it, offered Luka a large and constantly changing population of humans to feed on. She was an old vampire, intelligent and experienced, and she had little trouble feeding nightly. She had long ago learned how to leave wounds that healed almost instantly after feeding, and very few of her "victims" even knew that anything had happened to them.

And it had been several years since she had struck up a friendship with **any** being, human or inhuman. Nor had she been forced to do battle with any other supernatural entities for some time— they were a rarity in the modern world. She had no reason even to speak for weeks at a time.

Despite her comfortable existence on the busy and crowded college campus, Luka was very much alone in the world. She was a solitary creature, both as a vampire and by her own personality, but were she to stop and think about it too much... she was lonely.

She found herself inappropriately (for a vampire of her age) excited at the prospect of human companionship, despite all the dangers granting such a boon entailed. The campus was teeming with beautiful and intelligent young men and women, but none had piqued her interest as Miku had done. Somehow, Miku was special.

And there was also the question of Miku's "quick reflexes," as she had put it. No human should have been able to catch an old vampire like Luka, and no human should have been able to hold Luka back. Luka was very wise, and she found herself excited at the challenge of a new mystery to solve.

It had been a most promising night, Luka thought to herself. Some nights, it was good to be a vampire.


	2. First Date 1

I briefly considered writing Ruko's coffee-house into the story, but then I decided to use another Vocaloid in this AU.

This contains mild adult humor and themes, gratuitous weirdness, and a gross-out joke. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku was standing in front of her residence-hall room dresser mirror, touching up her make-up for the fifth or sixth final time. In order to dress up for her date without being too formal, she was wearing a long-sleeved button-down blouse and her best jeans.

A digital clock on the dresser turned from 5:59PM to 6:00PM, and a few seconds later, Miku and Gumi heard a firm knock at the door. "Do I look OK, Gumi?" a panicking Miku asked. "Is this too much eyeliner? Is my lipstick too bright? Are my twintails straight?"

Gumi was leaning against the wall across from Miku and next to the door, watching her with gentle amusement. "You look just fine to me, Miku," she said. "Relax, strike a pose and think sexy thoughts, and I'll get the door for you."

Gumi opened the door to find a vaguely female-shaped person wearing a loose black hooded sweater, black tights under a short black skirt, black boots, black gloves, and a full black face mask and heavy wrap-around sunglasses.

Without skipping a beat, Gumi turned back to Miku. "I'm afraid you'll have to postpone your date. Apparently, we're surrounded by ninjas."

"Not to be pedantic," the woman said from behind her mask, "but if I were not Miku's date, then I would be a _kunoichi_ instead of a ninja."

"Sorry, my anime-level Japanese isn't very good," Gumi said with a grin. "Hello. I'm Gumi, the nerdy roommate and heterosexual sidekick."

"I am pleased to meet you," the woman said. "I am the mysterious older woman and unexpected romantic interest."

"Why are you wearing so much clothing when it's so hot—" Miku suddenly cut herself off and slapped her forehead. "The **sun**! Oh, I am **so sorry**! I didn't mean to make you come out in the daytime! Why didn't you **say** something?"

"You stated your wishes clearly," the woman said calmly, "and I chose to grant them. A boon is not to be negotiated—"

"Forget the stupid boon!" Miku cried. "How could you let me put you in so much danger just for a date?"

"It is alright, Miku," the woman said. "Please do not worry. I walk about during the daylight hours of my own accord, and I was well prepared for it. I only have to shield my skin from direct sunlight."

"Do you have a skin condition?" Gumi asked. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have joked about your clothes. But yeah, aren't you **hot** dressed like that?"

The woman glanced behind Gumi to make sure the sunlight from the open window would not reach her. And then, she pulled off one glove. "Pardon my hand," she said as she held it to Gumi's cheek.

"YEEEK!" said Gumi with a shudder. "No, I guess **not**! Have you been moisturizing with liquid nitrogen?"

"You know what they say," Miku said nervously. "'Cold hands, warm heart.'"

The woman gazed at Miku from behind her mask and sunglasses. Even though her face was hidden, she seemed to be genuinely touched by Miku's casual compliment and concern for her well-being.

After a long awkward pause, Gumi cleared her throat, and gently pushed Miku towards the woman and the open door. "Oh-**kay**! Don't let **me** keep you! Run along now, and go do some lesbian stuff!"

"We will," an amused Miku said. "And you be sure to run along to the library and do some of your NERD! stuff."

Gumi gave Miku the finger again. "Screw you, and have a good evening!"

"Bite me, and thanks!" Miku closed the door behind her and the woman.

Gumi breathed out heavily. _Well, __**that**__ was awkward_, she thought. _I didn't even get to see what Miku's date looks like—_

And then, Gumi paused. She looked at herself in the mirror from where Miku had been touching up her make-up— and where the woman had just been standing.

_I could __**swear**_, Gumi thought to herself, _that Miku's date didn't have a reflection in the mirror!..._

* * *

Miku and Luka walked side by side away from the residence hall and in the general direction of the campus-town restaurants. The sidewalk was crowded with new students from many countries and cultures, and even in her unusual clothing, Luka drew little attention.

"You and Gumi seem to get along well," Luka said. "Did you know her before college?"

"Since our first year of grade school, actually," Miku said. "She lived close by, and, um, she came from a broken family, and she hung out at my house all the time. I was a single adopted child, myself, and she's been like a sister to me. And yeah, we tease each other a lot, but you have to be careful around her. She's actually really sensitive. Sometimes she's a complete 'cry-baby'."

"She did seem like a sensitive soul," Luka noted. "She also seemed very intelligent."

"Yeah, she's scary smart. Like, 'soopah-genius' smart. She could've graduated from high school early, but she waited for me to graduate, and she read the whole school library while she was waiting for me. I guess I should warn you that Gumi and I are inseperable. We're two for the price of one."

"Pardon my asking," Luka asked, "but if the two of you are **that** close, have you not thought of asking **her** on a date?"

"Nah," Miku said. "Ol' Gumi-bear is as straight as they come, even though she's always asking me if I want to, quote, 'fool around'. And a date with her would be like kissing a sister...

"But anyway. Where would you like to go to eat? We should make a decision before we walk too far in any one direction."

"Miku?... I cannot eat solid food," Luka said gently.

Miku face-palmed again. "Ah. Sorry. You're gonna have to help me out with exactly what you can and can't do—"

"To be specific," Luka continued, "I **can** chew and swallow solid food. But I have no need or ability to digest food for energy, and so it simply festers in my stomach until I force myself to regurgitate it."

"Aaaaannnd I just lost **my** appetite," Miku said with a grimace. "Can you drink? I mean, besides, um, 'ood-blay'."

"Yes, I can drink anything," Luka said. "But, while we are on the subject. Will you permit me to feed on you again? I can survive without 'ood-blay' for several days, but I prefer to consume a small amount every night."

Miku pointed at her collar with a wink. "I wore a blouse with buttons in the front for a reason. But can you wait until the end of our date? If it's anything like last time, it'd be, um, anti-climactic to do that first. Literally."

"Very well," Luka said with some amusement. "Yes, I can certainly wait that long."

"And in the meantime," Miku said, "I know just the place for us. I'm new in town, but I already have a favorite coffee-house. It's usually quiet, even on a Friday night. And it's at a basement level, with no windows."

"If it is your favorite," Luka said, "I am sure that I will enjoy it as well."

"And just wait," Miku said with a silly grin, "until you meet the barista."

* * *

Luka followed Miku down a set of recessed concrete steps and into the basement coffee house. As Miku walked through the heavy front doors, a tiny girl with long wild red hair looked up from behind the counter.

"Hello, Miki," said Miku, with one hand held up in greeting. "Working the Friday night shift by yourself again?"

"Hi, Miku!" the redhead said cheerfully. "No injuries or deaths in the workplace today... yet! Who's your extremely menacing friend?"

As Luka pulled off her mask and sunglasses in the safety of the basement-level room, Miku glanced at Luka nervously. "Um... actually, I'm not sure. It's kind of complicated..."

"Contextual social cognition complexity overload anxiety disorder, huh?" Miki said sympathetically. "Ooh, I **hate** it when that happens...

"Welcome to SF-A2 Coffee, Ms. Miku's Friend. My name is Miki, and I'll be your beverage request fulfillment technician, barring the total collapse of the space-time continuum."

"I should think that disclaimer applies to **all** business transactions," Luka said.

"Please take your time and look over our menu of the wretched excesses of exploitative post-scarcity global free-markets that are rending our society asunder," Miki said. "The usual, Miku?"

"Yes, please," said Miku. She leaned back and whispered in Luka's ear. "She memorized my favorite after one visit."

"One double ristretto venti full-roast half-soy nonfat decaf organic chocolate brownie iced vanilla cappuccino with whipped cream, extra foam, three ice cubes and a spring onion, coming up!"

"So... many... **words**..." Luka whispered in awe.

"And for you, Ms. Miku's Friend?" asked Miki with her best customer-service smile, as she effortlessly operated several coffee machines simultaneously.

An overwhelmed Luka stammered the first syllable that came to her vampiric mind. "Buh— buh— bloo—"

"**BLACK COFFEE!**" Miku shouted. "Um, cream on the side. Is that OK?" A wide-eyed Luka nodded dumbly.

Miki served the two coffees quickly. "Here's your **BLACK COFFEE!** with cream, and here's your **oh wow**!"

Miku blinked. "I don't usually get an 'oh wow'. Is that a special that comes free with a cappuccino today?"

"Lookit! Lookit!" Miki said excitedly. "The foam on your cappuccino looks just like the God-forsaken desolate moonscape of the Montes Cordillera!"

Miku looked at her coffee askance, one eye narrowed. "Miki?... I have **no** idea what I'm supposed to be seeing."

"If you clear your mind and unfocus your eyes," Miki suggested, "it helps you to see the true horrors behind the thin veneer of your fragile sanity."

Both Luka and Miku stared blankly at Miku's coffee, eyes crossed and heads tilted at odd angles, but to no avail.

"If there's anything else you need," Miki said, "just let me know, and I'll try to extract it from this planet's beleaguered ecosystem with a minimum of irreparable destruction. Have a nice day!"

Luka eyed Miki as she trotted away from the counter. "The atmosphere of this establishment is remarkably **grim**," Luka said thoughtfully, "and with occasional touches of existential nihilism."

Miku picked up her cup in both hands and continued to study it intently. "I don't know whether to drink this," she said, "or to film an experimental black-and-white horror movie based on it."

* * *

Luka and Miku took a small two-seat table in a far corner of the coffee house. Luka glanced back at the counter again. "Is Miki always, um?..."

"Clinically insane?" said Miku. "Yeah, pretty much. She's been working behind the counter every time I've come here. I think her family owns this place. But I think she's a college freshman too. I've seen her on campus a few times, crying out at the futility of it all and shaking her tiny fist at the sky."

"She is your age?" Luka asked. "She seems much younger than you, and she is certainly much **smaller** than you."

Miku shrugged. "They say coffee stunts your growth."

"Ah," said Luka. "Um, thank you for the coffee, and thank you for covering for my foolishness. I am sorry, but I am not used to such intense social interactions."

"'Intense' is a good word for it," Miku agreed. "But speaking of social interactions. Now that we're here, I have, like, a gazillion things I can't wait to ask you."

Luka daintily added some cream to her coffee. "Ask what you will," she said. "I shall entertain all questions this day, though my answers might not please."

"Well, first off, um... do you like girls? I mean, **really** like girls? I wanna know if this is just a date between, um, friends, or if it can be, um, more than friendly."

"That is actually **two** questions," Luka said. "Let me take them in order. As to the first question... Hmm. Well, the short answer is yes, I do "really" like girls.

"When I was mortal, I was heterosexual. But when I turned, and I was reborn, many things changed. I suppose I might now best be described as... pansexual? Physical attraction and sensuality are major aspects of my condition, as you yourself know. And when one does not know where one might next find blood, one cannot afford to rule out any segment of the general population."

"Good point," Miku said.

"And as to your second question? Well, **that** is up to **you**. I am here because you wished it, although I am pleased to be here. But I suggest that those two goals are not at all exclusive, and that friendship is both a worthy goal in itself and the basis on which to build a deeper relationship."

Miku stared blankly at Luka. "...whoah," she said softly. "That was **beautiful**. You're really amazing, you know?"

Luka allowed herself a small satisfied smile and a sip of her coffee. "I do my best," she said. "Next question?"


	3. First Date 2

This contains mild adult humor and themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

"I know you shouldn't ask a lady her age," Miku said, "but... how old are you?"

"Three hundred fourteen," Luka said.

Miku stared blankly at her again while that number sank in.

"I was born as a mortal in the year of our Lord sixteen hundred and ninety-nine," Luka said, "and so I have— just!— had the privilege of experiencing five human centuries... Miku? Are you alright?"

"Three hundred fourteen years old," Miku said again. "I... I just can't believe it."

Luka frowned in concern. "Oh dear. Perhaps this is too much for you, after all..."

"I'm sorry," Miku said with a straight face. "It's just, you don't look a **day** over two hundred."

Luka blinked. And then, she held a hand to her mouth and laughed out loud.

_Gotcha_, Miku thought to herself happily. "How many vampires are there now?"

"I do not know for certain," Luka said, "but I do have a rough idea. There are roughly three classes of my kind. There are perhaps five or six truly ancient vampires left in the modern world— vampires who have existed for thousands of years, or even longer. I am one of the merely mature vampires, and there are perhaps a few hundred of us at most. And then there are the newly turned... but most of them do not survive a week."

"Have you met any other vampires?"

"I have met one of the ancients," Luka said distantly. "I was still young, recently turned and greatly distressed, and as luck would have it, I found his refuge during my early wanderings. The ancient vampires live as ascetic hermits, and they have gained mystical wisdom beyond imagining. I begged him for any knowledge he could share, any meaning he could give to my existence, any hope he could offer to ease my eternal burdens. And I shall never forget what that old man said to me."

"What did he say?" Miku asked, her eyes wide as saucers.

"GET OFF MY LAWN," Luka said in a mock gruff voice.

It was Miku's turn to blink, and then to laugh out loud. Luka laughed with her.

"Oh, Miku!" said Luka, brushing tears of mirth from her eyes. "You have no idea how wonderful it is to laugh like this!...

"But to answer the question completely. I have also met several of the vampires near my own age, but most of them only once as well. There is one female vampire whom I encounter with some regularity... in fact, we are overdue for another encounter. I fear we have a rather, um, unconventional relationship."

"In what way?" Miku asked, feeling a sudden twinge of same-sex jealousy.

"She keeps trying to kill me," Luka said matter-of-factly.

"...oh," said Miku, her jealousy fading away immediately.

"Or rather, she keeps trying to ensnare me in comically ridiculous adventures of her own making. She has a flair for the melodramatic, but also... well, since she is native British, perhaps I should say that she is barking **mad**."

"Do you think she'll come here?" Miku asked eagerly. "Do you think I'll get to meet her too?"

"I should hope not," Luka said. "But you might actually know her. Tell me, Miku. Do you listen to opera?"

"No, I'm afraid not," Miku said. "Gumi says I have a beautiful singing voice, but also that I have **awful** taste in music."

"Oh?" asked Luka. "Do you like to sing, Miku?"

"It's weird," Miku confessed. "Yeah, I really like to sing... but sometimes, I also feel like I **have** to sing. It's like it's a part of what I am, you know?"

"Hmm," Luka said enigmatically.

"What was **that**?" Miku asked with a smile. "What was that enigmatic 'hmm' for?"

"Oh, nothing," Luka said, also enigmatically.

* * *

Some time later, Luka pushed her long-empty coffee cup aside. "I must beg an end to this audience. I do not usually talk this much, and I fear that I might soon lose my voice."

"One more question?" Miku asked.

"Alright," Luka said with a smile.

"**What**," Miku asked impatiently, "is your **freakin' name**?"

The smile fell from Luka's face. She turned slightly and looked past the room, into some distance that only she could see.

"...I am sorry... Miku Hatsune," she said slowly and quietly, "but I do not yet wish to share my name. I suppose you must think it strange that, having volunteered so much else, I would not give my name. But I have my reasons.

"Would this be acceptable? I would like to take you somewhere and show you something on our next date. Perhaps this Sunday afternoon, if you are free? And then, you shall know my name."

"Our next date? You mean... you want to see me again?" Miku said. "And we don't have to do a boon and stuff?"

"Yes," Luka said, a warm smile returning to her face. "If I may be so forward: You are special, Miku. You are already special to me. I am... captivated, and no boon and stuff is necessary. That is, if a second date is alright with you?"

_SQUEE!_ Miku thought. _SQUEE OHMIGOSH SQUEE SQUEE SHE LIKES ME SQUEE SQUEE SQUEE!_

"...yes, please," Miku said mildly.

* * *

Luka and Miku approached Miku's residence hall. The sun had set, and so Luka had taken off her face-mask and sunglasses.

"Thanks for walking me back," Miku said. "You're a real gentleman. Um, gentle-woman. Gentle-vampire. Gentle something or other."

"It was my pleasure," Luka said. "I wanted to make sure you were safe and sound. I would not want for you to be molested by a 'weirdo' again."

"What do you mean, 'again'?" Miku said. "If I said I was molested by a weirdo? I was wrong. She was kind of weird, I guess, but she was no weirdo."

"That is very kind of you to say," Luka said as they reached the front doors. "And yes, 'she' is kind of weird. But 'she' does her best."

"I guess this is good night, then. Thank you for answering all those stupid questions. I've had so much fun talking with you, and I can't wait to see you again."

"My feelings exactly," Luka said. "I did not realize how much I wanted companionship until you offered it to me."

"We don't have to wait until Sunday to talk again," Miku said. "Wanna text me? I'll give you my number—"

"I do not have a phone," Luka said.

"Oh," said Miku. "Want my e-mail address?"

"I do not have a computer."

"Oh. Wanna stand on the rooftops and shout my name?"

Luka smiled. "Perhaps I shall. But one thing remains, while we are still here, together."

Miku gazed into Luka's deep blue eyes, and she saw a flicker of red desire in the blue.

"...oh. Right," Miku said nervously. "The 'best part'. I can't believe I almost forgot about that... Um, right here? By the front doors?"

"This is a college campus," Luka said, "and it is a Friday night. I suspect a fair number of students, and faculty, are doing many unspeakable things together, in public, even as we speak."

"In that case," Miku said as she fumbled with the top buttons of her blouse, "here come two more... Ha ha. Oh wow. Ha ha. My hands are shaking. Ha ha. My heart is pounding like crazy."

"I can hear it, Miku," said Luka. She put one arm around Miku's waist, held the back of Miku's head in her other hand, and effortlessly leaned Miku back. Miku felt the world spin around her.

Luka nuzzled the base of Miku's neck. "Ready?" she asked softly.

Miku nodded, closed her eyes, and surrendered herself.

Luka fed.

Miku melted.

"...Miku? I am done," Luka said, after another moment that seemed to last for hours. "...Miku? Are you alright?"

"Could you... hold me... for a minute?..." Miku gasped. "Just until... I get my... breath back. You took... it away."

"Yes," Luka said, pulling Miku in closer to her. "I can hold you. And I will."

* * *

Miku quietly opened her dorm-room door. The room was dark, but Gumi was still awake and reading a textbook under a tiny lamp in her upper bunk-bed. "Hey there," Gumi said. "How'd it go?"

"Couldn't have gone better," Miku said, as she walked up to their shared mini-fridge. "She wants to see me again. She said she was captivated."

"Score one for Team Miku!" Gumi said proudly. "Do **you** want to see **her** again? Or at least, do you want to see her face-mask and sunglasses?"

"You better believe it," Miku said. She took a large carton of vegetable juice out of the fridge, and then took a long pull straight from the carton.

Gumi watched her with interest. _That's strange,_ Gumi thought. _Miku likes her juice, but she doesn't usually chug it down like she's low on fluids..._

Miku breathed out heavily, and put away what was left of the juice. "Whew. I needed that. I'm gonna crash, Gumi. Dating takes a lot out of you."

She flopped onto her lower bunk-bed without changing out of her clothes. "Ah... I can't believe I'm dating an adult. I can't believe I **am** an adult. I feel like a whole new life is waiting for me..."

Gumi didn't answer. But, before Miku could fall asleep, she began to hear sniffling and sobbing noises from above.

_Aw nuts_, Miku thought. _Was it something I said?_ "Talk to me, Gumi," she said.

"I'm sorry," Gumi said in a small sad voice. "...I'm really **happy** for you, Miku."

"You sure don't sound like it," Miku said kindly. "You wanna bunk down with me tonight?"

"...yeah," Gumi said shakily. She switched off her reading light, scooted back and climbed down her ladder. The bunk bed frame creaked in the quiet room.

A moment later, Gumi awkwardly climbed over Miku, and then snuggled in between Miku and the wall, resting her head on Miku's shoulder.

"...ugh," Miku said. "So hot."

"Sorry," Gumi said again. "But you'll have a girlfriend, sooner or later, and then you won't have to put up with cry-babies any more."

Miku sighed. "Is that what you're worried about? We're a pair, Gumi-bear. I'm not going anywhere."

"Yes you are," Gumi said. "You're going to become rich and famous, and rich, and gay-marry that woman, and have seventeen Science Babies with her, and live happily ever after. And I'll still be reading textbooks on Friday nights..."

"In the spare bedroom of our mansion," Miku said. "And you'll be Aunt Gumi to my Science Babies, and we'll **all** live happily ever after... but only until the man of your dreams comes along and steals **you** away and breaks **my** heart."

"Now I **know** it's only a fairy tale," Gumi said. "Promise me, Miku. Promise we'll be best friends forever. Promise you won't forget about me."

"Cross my heart and hope to die," Miku said, "'GumiMiku': You and I. Now go to sleep, you big nerd."

"I'll let that one slide," Gumi said. "Oh, and you had better have your way with me while I'm in your bunk and you're still single."

"And now I **know** you feel better," Miku said with a smile. "Love you, Gumi."

Gumi closed her eyes. "Love you too."


	4. Second Date 1

This chapter is a downer, but bear with me. There's a pretty hot make-out scene in the next chapter.

This contains brief descriptions of graphic violence and adult themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku was standing near the residence hall front doors on a sunny Sunday afternoon, looking for Luka in the wrong direction.

"Hello, Miku," said Luka, wearing her usual all-black outfit, and appearing from out of nowhere behind Miku.

"GAH!" said Miku. "You know, you're going to have to learn to stomp your feet, or whistle, or something."

"I did not mean to startle you," Luka said. "but I tread softly from three hundred years' force of habit."

"S'alright," Miku said with a smile. "So, where did you want to go today? I think you said you wanted to show me something."

Luka answered with another question. "Do you have an automobile? We could walk, but it might take a few hours from here."

"Sure thing," Miku said. "I'm parked right behind the hall." She led Luka around the building and into a student parking lot.

They walked up to a blue-green Corolla that perfectly matched the color of Miku's hair. "This automobile suits you, Miku," said Luka, "and it appears to be brand new."

"Yup," Miku said proudly. "This is my baby. Well, sort of. I worked my butt off in high school to make the down payment, but my father covers the monthly payments."

"Your father must be quite generous," Luka said, as she waited for Miku to unlock the doors.

"Just one of the bennies of being a single child and Daddy's little princess," Miku said, as she opened the driver's-side door. "OK, hop in... Oh, is the door still locked?"

Seeing that Luka was having trouble opening the passenger-side door, Miku reached across and opened the door from the inside. "There you go... Anyway, I offered to get a job at college, but my father actually said no. He told me that, as long as I can keep my grades up, I should concentrate on having fun for the next four years."

"That is wonderful," Luka said, as she closed her door much too gently.

"Your door is ajar," Miku said. "Pull it harder... No, push it open, and then pull it harder than that!... **There** you go. Yeah, my father is great. He even bought some stuff for Gumi when her family... couldn't be bothered. But I think he also wants me to have fun at college because I had a bad time in high school."

Luka looked at Miku with concern. "Was it because?..." she asked, not needing to finish her question.

"Yeah," Miku said. "I came out as soon as I knew, and I still don't know if I would do it again... I guess things are a lot better now for gay kids than they were just ten or twenty years ago, but high school is hard even when you're straight, and... well, let's just say that Gumi wasn't the only one who did a lot of crying back then. And I don't know what I would have done if Gumi hadn't been there for me. I might have done something **really** stupid."

"Did your parents support you?" Luka asked gently.

"My father warned me that it would be a hard path," Miku said, "but he also offered to beat the snot out of **anyone**, male **or** female, who gave me trouble about it. If I had let him do that, he'd be in jail for beating up half the school!..."

"But my mother..." Miku paused for a moment. "...she and I still talk, and we still love each other. And I think that she's a good person. But... **both** of us **know** the other person is **wrong**, and there's nothing either of us can do about it.

Miku hung her head. "And the worst part is, I know that my parents had some really bad arguments about me after I came out. I know it's not my fault, but I can't help but think I've come between them... and sometimes, I wonder if it might have been better if they had adopted someone else."

Luka didn't know what to say. After a moment, she cautiously rested a hand on Miku's shoulder instead.

Miku looked up again and rubbed her eyes. "Ah. Sorry. We're supposed to be on a date, and I'm supposed to be having **fun**, and instead I'm whining about my comfortable middle-class childhood in a stifling hot car."

She started the car's engine, and switched on its air conditioning. "That's better... Oh, you haven't put your seat belt on. No, it's over there... You just pull on it, and... here, let me. Pardon my reach." Miku nervously pulled the belt over critical areas of Luka's anatomy, and clicked the buckle into place.

Luka sat up stiffly, hands on her knees, and stared forwards unmoving, as if she were expecting great danger. "I'm beginning to think," an amused Miku said, "that you don't ride in cars very often."

"...maybe," Luka said in a small scared voice.

"Relax," Miku said. "I'm not **that** bad a driver."

* * *

Miku was driving slowly along a township road. The road was wide and well-maintained, but Miku was unfamiliar with its twists and turns.

"Stop here, please," Luka said. "There should be enough room to park your automobile along the side of the road here."

Miku pulled over as instructed, shut off the engine, and peeked through Luka's passenger-side window at the wooded hillside bordering the road. "Where?..." she asked.

"What I have to show you," Luka said, "is not visible from the road, but it is just over this hill. Um, could you release me?"

"Of course." Miku unbuckled Luka's seat belt, and then reached across Luka's lap and opened her door. "After you, Milady."

After locking her car, she followed Luka up the small but steep hill, and then, between the trees and pasture brush on the other side. "Is this private property?" she asked.

"Yes," Luka called back, "but the path is short, and I have never been confronted or asked to leave in the many times I have come... You can see it now, Miku."

"...a graveyard?" Miku asked with a wry grin. "We're continuing with the gothic theme, I see... Sorry, I don't mean to make fun of it. It's really pretty out here."

"Yes," Luka said, "but I have something more specific to show you. It is in the back corner. Be careful, Miku. The grass has not been cut for some time."

"I'm glad I wore jeans and heavy shoes," Miku said. "Wow, look at the dates on some of these gravestones. There's a lot of history here."

"Yes, there is," Luka said in a somber tone. She led Miku into a corner of the graveyard with only one marker still standing. "It is here."

Miku read the name inscribed on the gravestone out loud. "'Luka Megurine'... That's a pretty name. Was she one of your ancestors?"

"No, Miku," Luka said patiently. "She was **me**."

"...**oh**," Miku said. "I think I understand now."

"This is where I was buried," Luka said, "in the year of our Lord seventeen hundred and twenty, a few days shy of my twenty-first birthday." She reached out and touched her own grave marker. "I expect the local genealogy society has many theories as to why, in the oldest part of this remote boneyard, this grave alone remains marked. I believe mine might be the oldest marked grave in the county.

"It is a strange sort of vanity, I suppose, but I have tended to my own grave for these past three-hundred years, and I have kept the stone in good repair. Perhaps my death and burial should be relegated to history... but I must not let myself forget what happened here **after** I was buried..."

Luka fell silent. Miku stood by, also remaining silent, guessing that Luka had much more to say, and waiting for her to find the words to say it.

"...this," Luka finally said, "is also where I was reborn as a vampire, perhaps a week after I was buried. I awoke and, having assumed I had simply been buried alive, I desperately kicked at the top of my pine-box coffin until it split, not knowing my newly inhuman strength... and then, I clawed my way up through the mud and the snow until I reached the surface. Luck was with me, for it was a winter night when I emerged. Had I freed myself during the daylight hours, I would have perished immediately.

"Miku? When a vampire is abandoned after it has been turned, and is left to awaken by itself, it awakes in a greatly weakened state of intense bloodlust. This weakness is of both a mental and physical nature.

"In a physical sense, when a vampire is in bloodlust, its eternal youth and beauty is lost, and it is little more than a dessicated corpse— a skeletal thing with leathery flesh and hollow burning eyes— a monster.

"And in a mental sense, the intense craving for blood overwhelms all rational thought. A vampire in bloodlust does not employ any discretion, nor does it soothe its victim, as I do with you. It feeds like an animal.

"I found myself alone in the mud and the snow, and in the light of a full moon. I looked at my body, and saw that I was an animated corpse, a thing too horrible for any young woman to bear. And I lost my mind.

"When I came to my senses, I was whole and well again, in the fire-side warmth of a nearby farm house... and covered in the blood and gore of a young man whom I had just **murdered**. More than murdered— I had literally **torn** him to **pieces**. I can still taste... I can still **feel** his still-warm gristle in my mouth."

Miku flinched and held a hand over her own mouth. But she remained silent.

"I fled his house immediately," Luka said, "but I remained in this area long enough to watch his funeral. He was also laid to rest in this graveyard. From the trees, I watched his family dig his grave and bury his remains. I watched his widow and small children mourn their dead husband and father.

"I have always thought it somehow unjust... that **my** grave is still marked... but **his** grave... was never marked... and is... lost..."

Luka held her masked face in her gloved hands and trembled slightly. Miku still stood by silently, giving Luka the time she needed.

And then, Luka calmed herself and sighed heavily. "I have not taken another innocent life to this day. I try to consume a small amount of blood each night, instead of waiting until I must feed deeply, to lessen the risk of ever falling into bloodlust again. And, the occasional dalliance notwithstanding, I have mostly kept to myself for over three hundred years. Until now.

"I am happy that you wished to date me, Miku. Even if I never tasted your blood again, I would be happy merely to spend time with you, and to talk with you, and to laugh with you. I would be happy if things remained as they are between us. But... I know that you want more. And... damned fool that I am... I want more too.

"But every moment you spend with me, Miku, you put yourself in extraordinary danger. Sooner or later, I will make a mistake, or find myself in circumstances beyond my own control, and I **will** kill again. And it might be **you**.

"And I felt that I owed you a chance to change your mind. Before you become too emotionally attached to me. Before you learn to cherish my name. I felt that I owed you a chance to return to your normal mortal human life.

"If you turned and fled now? If you ran back to your automobile and sped away? I would not blame you, and I would not try to see you again. I would try to forget that I ever met you. I would never speak your name again, Miku Hatsune.

"I offer you this choice. You can have a care-free college career, and a normal life, and a human lover... or you can try to love a monster who has innocent blood on her hands, and one who will someday kill again. The choice is now yours."

And then, Luka turned away from Miku. Staring at her own name on her own gravestone, Luka waited for Miku to run away.


	5. Second Date 2

I don't usually write stuff like this, but I had half a chapter to fill, and so I tried to earn the "M" rating by describing one of Luka and Miku's trysts in more detail.

This contains adult humor and weird adult themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Luka stared at her name on her gravestone and waited. The graveyard remained as silent as it had been for most of the past three hundred years.

And then, Luka suddenly learned of Miku's choice, even though the silence remained unbroken. Miku threw herself at Luka and hugged Luka tightly.

Luka briefly trembled with emotion again. "...you are quite sure, Miku?" she asked, when she trusted herself enough to speak again.

"It might be a dangerous choice," Miku said into her shoulder. "And it might be hard, and weird, and crazy, and even stupid... but..."

She looked up at Luka, and gave Luka her best smile. "**Totally** worth it," she said with certainty.

Luka returned Miku's embrace. "Thank you, Miku." she said softly.

"You're welcome... Luka," said Miku. They held each other for a awhile longer.

And then, Miku looked up at Luka again. "Um, could we go somewhere else now? Unless there's something else we need to do here."

"No," Luka said contentedly, "I have done all that I came here to do. Where would you like to go?"

"Someplace where you can get out of the sun, take off your mask, and... you know," Miku said. "Both of us have been reliving bad memories today— although I have no place to complain after hearing your memories!— and I thought maybe we could make some good memories now."

"I would like that very much," Luka said. "And if you do not mind another five-minute walk, I know where we can go."

* * *

Miku followed Luka under more trees and along the shallow bed of a meandering pasture stream. It had no running water, only some wet mud between large flat limestone rocks. Luka and Miku easily kept their feet dry as they walked.

"I thought you were a suburban vampire," Miku said, as she skipped from stone to stone, "but you seem to know this area pretty well."

"I was born and raised near here," Luka said. "I often played in this stream in my human youth. The house where I lived is long gone, and the homestead is now a field of corn. But this stream has changed very little in three centuries...

"However, **this** is a much newer addition." Luka and Miku arrived at a large abandoned concrete culvert. The steep side of a raised railroad track bed stretched out to both sides, but the tracks were gone, and the track bed was crowned with more pasture brush.

"If you call this 'much newer', I'd hate to see what you call 'much **older**'." Miku peeked inside the culvert. "It's both creepy and romantic. That's just perfect for us."

"And it seems to be conveniently free of broken beer bottles and illicit drug paraphernalia today," Luka noted. "Mind your head. It is not quite tall enough to stand... Ah, good. It is dry inside."

Miku found a small mound of gravel inside the culvert, sat down, and leaned back against its curved wall. "The only culverts near where I grew up were full of garbage and sewer water. Gumi would have loved something like this when she and I were still kids. She probably would still love it. It could be her Soopah Sekrit Nerd Lair."

Luka had pulled off her mask and pushed back her hood. "Perhaps we can bring Gumi here sometime later," she said, as she shook her long hair free. "But for today, I am glad that only you and I are here."

"Yeah," Miku said, as Luka kneeled beside her. "Me too... Hey, Luka? You're not in any hurry, are you?"

"I literally have all the time in this world," Luka said, as she leaned over Miku, with one hand on both sides of Miku's head. Luka's hair fell down and formed a pink curtain around Miku's head and shoulders.

"In that case, um... instead of just 'going for the jugular'... could you start with a kuh- kiss? And then, maybe you could take your time going from there down to my shoulder? I mean, if that's OK with you."

"What a lovely idea," Luka said. "You see? Ideas like this are why I let you make the choices in this relationship. For far too long, I have thought of feeding as only a chore."

"Just because a girl has a vampire fetish," Miku said, "and just because you happen to be a vampire? That doesn't mean you don't still have to romance her now and then."

"I shall never take you for granted," Luka said. She leaned down, lowered her head, and looked deep into Miku's wide green eyes. And then, she leaned in further for the kiss.

And when she did not kiss as deeply as Miku wanted, Miku raised her own head up and pressed her lips against Luka's mouth more firmly. _...a passionate first kiss,_ Luka thought. _It makes me feel alive again._

After some time, Luka turned her head slightly, and began to decorate Miku's cheek and jaw with more kisses. "You do not find my lips cold?" she asked between pecks.

"Not at all," Miku said, already short of breath. "Don't stop... Oh, that's— BWAH HA HA HA HA HA!"

Luka raised an eyebrow. "That," she declared, "is not exactly the reaction I was anticipating."

Still giggling, Miku reached down and scrabbled at the concrete surface under her. "I am so sorry, Luka. My shirt pulled up, and it feels like there's a weed or something against my back... yeah, there it is."

Miku pulled out a dry foxtail head, held it up and looked at it, and then cast it aside. "I didn't see that when I sat down here. I'm really sorry. It's just, I'm crazy ticklish."

_THE SUBJECT IS TICKLISH_, Luka thought to herself. _THIS INFORMATION IS TO BE RETAINED INDEFINITELY FOR POSSIBLE FUTURE APPLICATION._

"Do you think you could pick up where you left off?" Miku said softly. "I'll try to take your attentions more seriously this time."

"You **are** a **most** impudent child," Luka said melodramatically, returning to Miku's jawline. "But I shall carry on nonetheless."

Luka worked her way up Miku's jaw, taking a detour in order to nibble on her ear. "I remember," she said, "when a certain somebody played rough with my ear. I should like to have sweet revenge now."

"...show no mercy..." Miku whispered.

Luka ran her tongue and lips along the folds of Miku's ear, taking care to leave no skin untouched. She was rewarded with a very happy smile, and a first soft sigh, from Miku.

And then, Luka began her slow but sure descent along the length of Miku's neck. _Slowly, Luka,_ she thought to herself. _She is enjoying this, so work slowly, and make it last longer._

Miku pulled at Luka's still-gloved hand, and she pressed it against her own chest. But, instead of accepting the invitation to fondle Miku, Luka lowered her hand further and held it flat below Miku's breasts.

_I can feel her heart pound_, Luka thought. _Her little heart is beating so fast. And she is so soft, and so warm. She is like a little bird in my hand. I must treasure this beautiful little bird._

Luka was near the base of Miku's neck now. But she continued further, pulling gently at Miku's shirt and tracing a line above Miku's collarbone. Miku rolled her head slightly away and twisted her shoulder.

Feeling the craving for Miku's blood rise up in her, Luka tilted her own head and playfully traced a pattern with one fang. Miku twisted against Luka again, as if she actually wanted the fang to break skin.

And then, Luka began to circle back to her final destination. Her eyes now glowed red with desire, and she knew that she would not be able to hold back much longer.

Without looking away from Miku's neck, she raised her hand and hastily pulled off her glove. And then, she felt for Miku's hand, held it, and linked fingers with Miku.

"...**please**," Miku gasped. "**...DO IT.**"

With her lips still pressed against Miku's neck, tasting Miku's skin just one more time, Luka smiled. "Yes," she said simply.

And then, she fed.

Miku arched her back, scrabbled at the concrete again with her free hand, and made a strange half-grunting, half-squeaking sound. The effect was so utterly overwhelming that everything went white.

And though she still fed, Luka's eyes widened as well. _What is this feeling?_ she thought. _Am I feeling what she is feeling? This has never happened before!..._

_It... it feels... __**good**__._

Luka rolled away from Miku, caught her own breath, and examined herself, to make sure that she had not spilled any blood. And then, she turned back to Miku.

"Um, are you alright?" Luka asked nervously. "I fear that, somehow, I rather let myself get carried away."

"I'm sorry," Miku said, still breathless and staring vacantly at the ceiling of the culvert. "But Miku isn't here anymore... because you SENT HER TO HEAVEN."

"Yes, I know," Luka said. She rolled over again, and lay beside Miku, and also looked up at the concrete above her. "I felt it too, Miku. For the first time in over three hundred years, I felt the effect myself."

"Really?" Miku said. "That's awesome! Do you know why?"

"...I am not sure," Luka said hesitantly, closing her eyes.

But Luka suspected why.

She was not ready to admit it even to herself. But Luka suspected that, for the first time in over three hundred years, she was falling in love.

* * *

An unhappy Miku parked her car in the student lot behind her hall, and then let Luka out. Despite the serious matters they had discussed earlier, Miku and Luka were only now having their first real argument.

"I don't want to wait until next Friday to see you again!" Miku said petulantly. "And besides, our football team has a home game, this Saturday, and I have a cheerleaders' dress rehearsal this Friday evening."

"Then I shall meet you after the rehearsal is over," Luka said. "Miku... our relationship has only just begun, and it might not be healthy to continue at this pace. And you also have your classes and activities, and your friend Gumi. You must maintain your friendship with Gumi. And... I need some time and space for reflection as well."

Miku pouted. "But it's five whole days without you! I'm gonna miss you so much!"

"I am sorry," Luka said. "But I promise you, our third date will be worth the wait."

"What do you mean?" Miku asked innocently, their argument suddenly forgetten.

"Oh, Miku!" an amused Luka said. "I am largely divorced from modern society, but I overhear many conversations, and I read the occasional magazine. Even ***I*** know what people often do on the third date."

"...oh," Miku said.

And then, Miku's face went **very** red. "...**oh**," she said again.

Luka giggled. "I do not mean to embarrass you, Miku, but I see no reason not to be frank. I am quite sure now that you desire this, and I want to fulfill your desires.

"And before you ask: Yes, a vampire can do **that** as well. I do not know if I can match this afternoon's performance, but I still think that I could make you **very** happy.

"As always, the choice is yours. But... after our third date has ended, I would be delighted to spend the night with you."

Miku gulped.

Luka leaned in towards Miku's face. The sun had not yet set, and she was unable to raise her face-mask to kiss Miku goodbye. But she held Miku's face in one gloved hand and lovingly caressed Miku's cheek.

"I am sure that you have much to think about between now and Friday," Luka said. "But until then? Take care, dear Miku."

Miku was lost in a world of her own. She absently watched Luka walk away, but she did indeed have much to think about.

_Oh, __**wow**__,_ Miku thought. _I'm gonna have __**sex**__._

But then, she frowned. _Wait a minute,_ she thought. _Does what we did this afternoon already count as sex? I am __**so**__ confused..._


	6. Third Date

This contains adult humor and themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku's Friday night cheerleading dress rehearsal had run long and late. The girls were still practicing their routines in the short grass of a small soccer field at the edge of the campus, even though the field floodlights had long since switched on.

As soon as the sun had set, a mysterious older woman with pink hair had appeared from out of nowhere. She lurked in a line of trees along one side of the soccer field, unseen by all— or so she had thought.

"Hi, Ms. Miku's Friend!" a familiar voice suddenly said to her. "Whatcha doin' out here?... Oh, I see. Creeping on the cheerleaders, huh?"

Luka froze in surprise, and then turned to find Miki standing next to her, holding a pair of big heavy textbooks and a **huge** plastic mug of evening coffee.

"...Ah," Luka said. "Miki from the coffee-house, yes? Hello. I am only waiting to meet with Miku after her rehearsal—"

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Miki said. "Of course you're not a scary creeper."

Luka smiled. "That is alright—"

"You're a love-crazed obsessive stalker instead!" Miki declared.

Luka didn't like where this was going, and so she tried to change the subject. "How did you happen to see me here?"

"This is along a shortcut that I take back to the coffee-house after my evening class," Miki explained. "And besides that? I'm always seeing things that other people can't see."

"...is that so?" Luka asked with genuine interest.

"Yup!" Miki said proudly. "And you know what else?"

"What is that?" Luka asked. For a moment, she imagined that she sensed something unusual about Miki, the same as she had done with Miku.

"Sometimes," Miki said in a conspiratory whisper, "the things I see aren't merely schizophrenic hallucinations. Sometimes they're **actually there**."

Luka liked where **this** was going even less than before. Forgetting her intuition, she tried to change the subject again. "I see that you are carrying philosophy textbooks, Miki. Was your class in philosophy?"

Miki nodded. "That's my major. But I guess I'm doing things backwards. Most people get their philosophy degree first, and **then** settle for a low-paying job at a coffee-house, making silly drinks and having pointless arguments with hyper-caffeinated hipsters."

"There is nothing wrong with that," Luka said with a smile, "as long as that is what you like."

Miki looked up at the night sky. "My minor is astronomy. That's my favorite subject, and an astronomy degree would be even more awesomely useless. But my math isn't good enough to major in astronomy.

"Even here in the city, the night sky is so beautiful. There's nothing like looking up at a night sky to remind you that our tiny terrestrial existence is utterly insignificant and devoid of any meaning or purpose."

"...quite," Luka said in reluctant agreement. They both looked up between the trees at the night sky for awhile.

When Miki spoke again, her voice had a more serious tone. "You and Miku are a couple, aren't you? I didn't mean to spy on you, but you looked like you were on a date, last week. And she looked like she was having fun talking to you."

"Yes," Luka said. "We are dating now, and I believe we enjoy each other's company greatly."

"That's so cool," Miki said. "Miku is really special, you know. I hope you can make her happy.

"I have lots of regular customers at the coffee-house. But a lot of them aren't very nice. A lot of them just yell at me, or else they creep on me— and I look like a little girl, and that makes it even more creepy.

"And even if they are nice, after I try to talk to them, they stare at me like a deer caught in the headlights of a semi, and they can't wait to pay for their coffee and get out. In a way, that hurts me even more.

"Miku is one of the few regular customers who is always nice to me **and** who has the patience to listen to me being weird. And I can tell that she's been through bad times, but she still loves to talk to people...

Miki blushed a little. "Oh, listen to me. Now ***I*** sound like the stalker. But I hope you and Miku are happy together. And I hope you'll come back to the coffee-house sometime soon. It's been nice talking to you too."

"Thank you, Miki," said Luka. "I have enjoyed this as well. Yes, perhaps all three of us can have a chat at your coffee-house."

"I'd like that," Miki said. "Well, I'd better go home before I become a violent crime statistic. See ya later. And don't worry about Miku too much, OK?"

Luka raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"The sport of modern cheerleading is **extremely** dangerous," Miki said, as she walked away. "These days, cheerleaders have almost as many serious injuries as the teams they're cheering. But the chances are still relatively small that Miku will suffer irreversible brain damage or spinal-cord injury and become a quadriplegic vegetable for the rest of her life."

Luka watched Miki walk away with a blank stare. And then, she turned back to the field, just in time to see Miku practice a simple tumbling routine.

Luka's eyes widened in fear. She held both hands over her mouth and whimpered.

* * *

Miku's rehearsal was finally over. She had just got a towel from her duffel-bag when she felt a gentle embrace from behind. "Wha— oh, Luka! You scared me!... Hey, are you OK?"

An emotional Luka desperately clutched at Miku. "I am so relieved that you are unharmed!" she whispered tearfully.

"Um... thanks?" Miku nervously patted Luka's hand. "Hey, c'mon! Not in front of the girls! This is kind of embarrassing."

As Miku's cheerleading team-mates noticed the older woman hugging her, they began to whistle and whoop happily. Miku soon found herself and Luka at the center of attention.

Miku gave her team-mates a smile and a thumbs-up. _On the other hand_, Miku thought, _this Public Display of Affection should be really good for my gay cred._

* * *

"I am sorry about that scene," said Luka, as she and Miku left the soccer field. "I happened to talk with Miki from the coffee-house, and—"

Miku held up a hand. "Say no more. I understand completely now."

"Do you mind wearing your cheerleading uniform on our date?" Luka asked. "I certainly would not complain. It suits you, Miku."

"Um, yeah. About that." Miku rubbed her neck in embarrassment. "Sorry, but I already ate dinner with the girls. And I'm sorry rehearsal ran so long, but it's really late now, and I'm kinda tired..."

Luka nodded patiently, but she also braced herself for the disappointment of a canceled date.

"...and I was wondering if it wouldn't be too weird if we just, um, went back to my room now." Miku asked with a shy smile.

Luka felt her spirits rise again. "I do not know if that would be weird or not," she said softly, "but I would not mind it at all."

Miku reached out, took Luka's hand and held it tightly. And then, she and Luka began to walk back to her residence hall.

* * *

As soon as they had reached Miku's room, Miku had excused herself and ducked down the hall for a quick shower after several hours of hard exercise. Luka sat on Miku's lower bunk-bed, legs crossed and eyes closed, half-way between deep thought and meditation.

Miku knocked softly at the door to alert Luka, and then came in, wearing a soft fuzzy teal bath robe. "Sorry for the wait," she said. "You know, given what we're about to do, you should have taken a shower with me."

"I would not want to risk being caught with you in the shower," Luka said. "I do not think I am supposed even to be here. But perhaps we could wait for a warm summer night's rainfall, drive out into the countryside, take off our clothes and dance together in the rain."

Miku felt herself go weak in the knees. "You've already seduced me, you know," she said. "You don't have to be so effortlessly romantic."

"I cannot help it when I am with you." Luka took in the sight of the freshly showered Miku. "This is the first time I have seen you with your hair down. It makes you look more mature."

Miku instinctively pulled a hand through her hair. "Yeah... I've worn my hair in twin-tails my whole life, but I don't know how much longer I can keep them. Not many college girls still have twin-tails."

"Perhaps you could wear the tails lower," Luka said, reaching out to stroke Miku's hair as well. "I would not mind any style... but I might ask that you continue to wear your hair long."

"No problem," Miku said. "I have thought about having it bobbed to match Gumi for fun, but I couldn't bring myself to have it cut that short."

"By the way, where is Gumi?" asked Luka. "I hope that we have not evicted her from her own room."

"She took a pillow to the library," Miku said. "She said she could stay in a study room and let herself be locked in overnight. They don't usually allow things like that, but Gumi has already spent so much time at the library that she has contacts and friends in high places."

"How very thoughtful of her," a touched Luka said. "I suspect she is the one who put black paper over the window as well, because of my 'skin condition', as she took it."

"Don't give her too much credit," Miku said with a grin. "Ever since I asked for some privacy tonight, all I've heard is, 'is there anything else I can do to help you get laid?'"

"Then I must not disappoint her," Luka said. She stood up and embraced Miku. "Pardon my awkwardness. It has been some time since I have done this, and I am rather nervous myself."

"Since you mentioned it," Miku asked, "how long has it been?"

"Eighty-seven years," Luka said, "five months and twenty-three days."

Miku giggled. "But who's counting? Sorry, Luka. That's one heck of a 'dry spell'."

"May I ask the same question of you?"

Miku grimaced. "Ah. Well. To be honest? Unless you count that thing we did in the culvert? This is my first time past 'second base'."

A suddenly tearful Luka hugged Miku tightly again. "Oh, Miku!" she cried.

"Hey, calm down!" Miku said modestly. "You shouldn't be surprised. I told you when we first met that I don't do one-night stands."

"But you have always been so relaxed and confident with me," Luka said.

"I guess I'm a quick learner... so, um, how does this work with a vampire? Do you usually feed before or after all the other stuff?"

"Oh dear," Luka said, "Perhaps I should have discussed this with you before, but... I have never fed and made love at the same time. I fed deeply last night so that I could safely skip tonight."

"...oh," said Miku. "Well, that might be for the best. I don't know if I could handle this **and** that in one night."

"There are many other things that we can do instead." Luka lay back on Miku's bunk bed, with her arms above her head, and looked up at Miku expectantly.

"Wait a minute," Miku said. "Do you want **me** to take the lead? I thought the older woman usually led the virgin down the wanton path of desire."

"You initiated this relationship," Luka said, "and so I thought that you would like to consummate it. And also? I must admit that I, um, 'like it' when you make the choices and take control."

Miku grinned. "Seriously? You're not just joking? Or trying to build up my self-esteem? Because I'm just as happy to give as to receive."

"For tonight, and perhaps for many nights... I am yours, body and soul, to do with as you will."

Miku theatrically cracked her knuckles, and then slowly climbed on top of Luka. "In **that** case... I know a certain vampire who's already had her way with me three times. Let's see if I can even the score tonight."

Luka's eyes widened. "Three times in one night?" she asked very nervously. "You do not have to be **that** generous. And this is not a game in which we keep score, Miku. You do not owe me anyEEEEE HEE HEE!"

"Oh, I **insist**," Miku said, as she caressed and undressed her lover. "Miku Hatsune repays her debts. With **interest**."


	7. Fan Service Episode

Fan service episode.

This contains EXTREMELY gratuitous nudity, mild adult language, and adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Late the next morning, Gumi clumsily opened the door to her residence-hall room while juggling her backpack, her pillow, and a freshly baked pizza in a warm box.

She was also singing to herself, improvising new lyrics to a lunch-meat commercial jingle from before she was born. "My pizza has a first name, it's P-I-Z-Z-A... My pizza has no second name, 'cause that would just be weird... WHOAH!"

Miku was sitting up in her bunk bed, her back against the wall, with a sleeping Luka snuggled up on her lap. Both women were wrapped in bedsheets from the waist down, but both were nude from the waist up. Luka was lying face down, and Miku was contentedly stroking Luka's hair.

Miku looked up. "Oh, hey, Gumi. C'mon in. It's OK— we're just cuddling."

"Are you sure?" Gumi asked nervously. "Sorry, I thought you'd be up by now. It's almost eleven o'clock."

"Oh, come on," Miku said. "It's nothing you haven't seen before. But be quiet, OK? Luka is still asleep."

"Um, OK." Gumi set her backpack down by the door, carefully placed her pillow up on her own bed, and sat at her desk, next to Miku.

"Wow, she's out like a light," Gumi said. "I guess she usually sleeps during the day, huh? What with her, um, skin condition, and all."

"Yeah, I think so," Miku said with a smug grin. "But she's also exhausted from last night. I wore her out."

"Ruh- really?" Gumi asked, even more nervously.

"Yup," Miku said proudly. "As it turns out, this innocent little cheerleader is actually a RELENTLESS SEX MACHINE."

Gumi obviously didn't know how to take this news. "...oh. Ha ha. Oh wow. That's, um... *_giggle_* *_snort_*... **wow**."

"Fear not, my faithful sidekick," Miku said. "I shall strive to use my new-found powers for good, and not for evil."

Gumi glanced down at Luka again. "Her name is Luka? This is the first time I've really seen her... and now I'm seeing **all** of her. I hope she's an exhibitionist like you."

"Go ahead and take a closer look," Miku said. "She's never been shy around me. And I never get the chance to show her off."

"She's a pinkette, huh?... Oh Miku, she's gorgeous. I was afraid her skin would be broken or scarred, but she's just perfectly pale, like a living china doll. You've got something really special there."

Miku suddenly felt a typical Miku-esque twinge of jealousy. "Hey! This is **my** mysterious older woman! Get yer **own**, bitch."

Gumi giggled and held up her open hands. "Relax, Miku. I wouldn't dream of trying to take her from you, even if I swung that way. You two look like you were made for each other."

"Yeah..." Miku looked down, and stroked Luka's hair again. "I think she was made for me, Gumi. This is all happening crazy fast, but... I think I love her."

Gumi gasped. "Miku! Be careful! She **is** an older woman, you know! You haven't said that to her, have you?"

"She has now," Luka said, awakening at an opportune moment and looking up at Miku with a sweet smile.

"AAUGH!" said Miku. "No fair! That's cheating! Take-back! Rewind! Strike that last remark from the record!"

"Please do not be embarrassed." Luka raised one arm and caressed Miku's cheek. "As you say, this has happened 'crazy fast', and I have tried to take it more slowly. But since we are both happy to be together, perhaps it does not matter. I have just awoken, but I feel as if I am still in a dream.

"Miku... I love you too."

Miku held a hand over Luka's hand and pressed it against her cheek. She looked down at Luka with an unusually vulnerable expression, as though she were about to cry.

But Gumi beat her to it. Miku looked up, and Luka turned back, to see Gumi rubbing at her eyes. "Sorry again," a sniffling Gumi said quietly. "That scene should have been private... but I'm so happy that I got to see... my best friend... find love..."

Not knowing what else to do with herself, Gumi picked up her pizza box, opened it and held it out. "Pizza? It has sausage, green peppers, and tears of joy on it."

"Thanks, Gumi-bear. I'm starving." Miku went for the largest slice. "And yeah, I'm glad you were here for that, and for us, too."

Gumi lowered the box towards Luka. "Help yourself, Luka."

Instead of accepting or refusing the pizza, Luka looked back up at Miku with concern. "You have told her my name?" she asked.

Miku froze in mid-bite, and then lowered her pizza and face-palmed with her free hand. "Aw, nuts. I'm sorry. I was careless."

Luka was thoughtful for a minute, but then she relaxed. "What is done is done. And perhaps that does not matter either."

"Do you want to keep your relationship with Miku a secret?" Gumi asked. "I could understand that, Luka. My lips are sealed."

"Thank you, Gumi. I would appreciate that." Luka reached out and held Gumi's hand. "I hope I do not seem to be aloof, but I must be careful, more for Miku's sake than my own. Regardless, I hope that we can be friends as well. And I know Miku is dear to you, and so you must tell me if you ever feel that I am taking Miku away from you."

Gumi went all misty-eyed again. "You're kind **and** beautiful? Oh, Miku! I think you found an angel!"

"That is very kind of you to say," Luka said softly. "But I am no angel. Quite the opposite, in fact."

"You're aces in my book. Both of you are." Gumi pulled away from Luka and stood up. "But since I've delivered the pizza and witnessed your relationship milestone, I probably should get back to the library and give you some more private time—"

"Aw, don't go, Gumi-bear," said Miku through a mouthful of food. "Hang with us for awhile."

Gumi frowned. "...really? Are you sure?"

"I would also enjoy your company," Luka said.

"Well, OK. Thanks." Gumi sat back down. "But do you two think you could get dressed now? I mean, I'm not seriously uncomfortable, but this is still kinda weird, talking to both of you like this."

"I can't speak for Luka," said Miku, "but I don't have to be at the football game for a few more hours, and I was hoping that I could chill with my bestie **and** have naked cuddles with my new girlfriend until then."

Luka snuggled up in Miku's lap again. "I am happy to be here as I am," she said, "and even more so if it pleases you."

Gumi glared at Luka and Miku with sudden Nerd Rage. "...**what**?" Miku asked with a nervous smile.

"**Fine**," Gumi said. "If that's the way you want to be? **Three** can play at that game." She pulled up her shirt.

"Um, Gumi?" asked Luka. "What are you doing?"

"Duh!" said Gumi. "I'm taking off my clothes!"

"What my intelligent but confused girlfriend meant to ask is, **why** are you taking off your clothes?" Miku said. "Luka and I might be rushing into this relationship, but it's still too early for our inevitable threesome with you."

Gumi unfastened her shorts and slid them to the floor. "If you two are gonna be all naked and weird at me," she explained, "then the least I can do is to be all naked and weird back at you!"

"That is an unusual response to an unusual situation," Luka thought out loud.

"But Gumi, that isn't going to work," Miku said gently. "Your being naked isn't weird at all for us. Luka and I **like** naked women."

"I know that!" an exasperated Gumi said, as she unhooked her bra. "But work with me here! Pretend I'm a guy, or something."

"I'm afraid I can't do that," a **very** happy Miku said, "because BOOBS."

Luka's eyes widened slightly. "Oh my! Gumi, you have a **lovely** figure."

Miku suddenly felt another Miku-esque twinge of jealousy. "Hey! That's **my** bodacious nerdy roommate! Get yer **own**, bitch."

Luka continued her thought undeterred. "You should wear more flattering clothing, Gumi. Not every girl needs to be a cheerleader, but still, you should enjoy your youth and be proud of your beauty."

"Thanks, Luka," said a now naked Gumi, "but I'd really rather not. Chemical engineering is a male-dominated field of study, and everybody stares at my chest most of the time already. I'd like for my teachers and classmates to at least occasionally make eye contact."

She looked down at herself. "And these **things** are nothing but trouble anyway. Every time I turn around, they're knocking over test tubes and ruining lab work. I can't even read books around them."

"Oh, it's so **hard** to be well-endowed and nerdy!" Miku said with absolutely no sympathy at all. "You know, if you hate those 'things' that much, you could give them to me."

"Don't make me laugh," Gumi said with an unusually cruel smirk. "If you tried to hold up these puppies on that skinny little body of yours, you'd snap in half like a dry twig."

"Please do not be jealous of your friend, Miku." Luka reached up again and brushed Miku's chest lightly with the back of her fingers. "You are **both** beautiful, and I am happy with you as you are."

Miku giggled. "Luka, please! Not in front of the children! And I don't want any sympathy from you while we're talking about size. You're no slouch in that department yourself."

"I can't believe I'm about to ask this," Gumi said, "but Luka? Can I see your?... Can I see yours?"

"That seems only fair." Since Luka was still lying face-down in bed, she turned to face Gumi fully.

"...you win," Gumi said in a small scared voice.

"She's a winner, alright," Miku said proudly. "I never realized that sitting around naked could be this much fun. What say we declare Saturdays in this room clothing-optional?"

"I don't know about that," Gumi said, "but the occasional private toga party might be nice while it's still so hot."

"Speaking of parties," Miku said, "we should play some music while 'quiet hours' are lifted for the weekend. Turn on the radio, Gumi."

"Good idea," Gumi said. She reached back and switched on a radio on Miku's desk. But unfortunately for her, Miku had tuned the radio to the local top-40 station.

"Oh, **yuck**!" said Gumi. "Dude! Your tunes suck!"

"Not every song has to be a symphony, you big nerd," Miku said. "And besides, I **like** this song. It's really catchy." She closed her eyes and began to sing along with the song on the radio.

Three minutes later, the song faded out, and Miku realized that both Gumi and Luka were blankly staring at her with their mouths hanging open. "It's not **that** catchy," she said nervously.

Gumi spoke without moving, as if she were hypnotized. "You know that thing that you do to people when you sing? You're doing it again."

"Is she always this captivating when she sings?" Luka asked, also finding herself unable to look away.

"Even more so lately," Gumi said. "We can't even go to karaoke anymore. The last time Miku sang in public, several people were so taken with her voice, they passed out because they forgot to keep breathing."

"Now I'm beginning to regret my vow not to use my newly-discovered sex machine powers for evil," Miku said sadly. "I have **two** entranced and naked women, and I already love them and they already love me, but I can't make them my playthings because of my darn moral rectitude."

"I do not mind," Luka said sincerely. "I have let you make all the choices in this relationship, and I have yet to regret it. Not to mention that, after last night's performance, I was already considering the benefits of becoming your eternal love slave."

Miku gulped. "I appreciate the thought, Luka, but that's exactly what I'm trying to avoid—"

Gumi shook off her entrancement and piled on. "Yeah, and if Luka is OK with it, my offer still stands too. I know I'm only your straight friend, but if it's with **you**, I'm up for **anything**. Just say the word, and I'll be all over you like a teenager on pizza."

"That kind of talk is NOT HELPFUL right now!" Miku clutched at her poor head. "MUST— RESIST— TEMPTATION!"

Gumi taunted Miku in a super-villain's deep voice. "Come to the Dark Side, Miku! We have pizza and boobs!"

"NOOOO!" Miku cried out theatrically. She slumped over with her eyes crossed and her tongue hanging out.

And then, Miku, Luka and Gumi all burst out laughing together.


	8. The Iceman Cometh 1

This takes place three or four weeks after the previous chapter.

I first meant to write Kaito as the usual loveable bumbling idiot of Vocaloid fandom, but he quickly turned into a (literally) cold-blooded killer in this AU, and so I had to switch genres to action-horror for the next three chapters.

We'll return to the previously scheduled yuri shenanigans in chapter 11. That chapter ends with a tickle fight.

This contains violence and adult themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku had taken a detour into the campus town after her last class of the afternoon for a pick-me-up from Miki's coffee-house.

"Hot chocolate to go, please," Miku said to Miki. "Can you believe this weather, Miki? It was so hot the day before yesterday, and now— **brrrr**! Just listen to that wind! And we could even get some snow tonight!..."

Miki served Miku's hot chocolate silently. "Are you OK?" Miku asked. "You're not acting like your usual gleefully gloomy self."

"I **hate** storms," Miki said miserably. "And this is a really bad storm."

"Yeah, I know," Miku said sympathetically. "But it's only a little rain—"

"No, Miku," said Miki. "This is a **bad** storm. Bad things happen in this kind of storm. **Really** bad things."

Miku shivered again, and then giggled nervously. "Gosh, Miki! What are you saying? You're really scaring me! I mean, even more than usual."

Miki suddenly reached out and rested a hand on Miku's arm. "Hey, Miku? I know we don't really know each other that well, but... well... just be careful, OK?"

"I will," Miku said with a warm smile. "But don't worry, hon. I'm heading straight back to the residence hall. I'll be just fine. You stay warm and dry too, Miki."

Miki gave Miku a thin smile in return. "Thanks, Miku."

Miku turned and left with a wave. "See you again this Friday."

A still and silent Miki watched her leave. _I hope so, Miku_, she thought to herself. _I hope I see you again._

* * *

The cold air over the college campus was heavy with a fine mist. Several people remarked that it seemed as if the overcast sky had sunk nearly to the ground. The mist was not as heavy as rain, but the few pedestrians out on the normally busy campus soon found themselves soaked.

And the wind howled. Waves of air were visible in the still-green grass, and smaller tree branches whipped from side to side. Bits of paper and cardboard appeared from nowhere, briefly danced in the wind, and disappeared into nowhere again. The heavy old campus buildings were undamaged, but they rattled and groaned.

Miku's residence hall was not as tall as the newer residence towers, but it seemed to bear the brunt of the winds. Had anyone been standing on the roof of the residence hall, they might have had difficulty standing upright. But no one was foolish enough to stand on the roof in the storm.

Until... someone **was** standing on the roof.

A young man with a slight build and cold blue hair rapidly coalesced from the mist. He wore a long white coat with strange markings under a light thin blue scarf. His coat and scarf whipped in the bitterly cold and mist-heavy wind, but he was unmoved. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying himself.

The man incongruously reached into his coat and pulled out a popsicle. He pulled off its wrapper, let the wrapper blow away in the wind, and licked silvery frost from the end of the popsicle.

"The iceman cometh," he said to the campus.

* * *

Luka's eyes snapped open. She had been drifting in and out of uneasy sleep all afternoon, but she was very suddenly wide awake. She pulled on her mask and sunglasses, pulled her hood tight and knotted its draw-strings, and pulled on her gloves, in seconds flat.

She burst from the storage room where she had been hiding, and ran along an empty hall for the nearest exit, her feet barely touching the floor more quickly than any human eye could see. She slammed open the door, taking no notice of the emergency alarm that she had set off, or the wind that briefly pushed back against the door. She paused only long enough to look to the sky.

And then, Luka jumped.

Luka could not fly. But she could jump with great speed and strength, such that she might have seemed to fly for short distances. She could even leap over tall buildings with a single bound.

After six or seven hops, Luka landed on the roof of Miku's residence hall. She steadied herself after landing, and then she looked up and faced down the man in the white coat and blue scarf.

"You're a long ways from home, elemental," she said. "Why are you here?"

"Who can tell?" the man said in a sing-song voice. "Perhaps, somewhere in this small world, a butterfly flapped its wings..."

The man waved his free hand, and a few small flat glittering shards of ice also coalesced from the mist. They seemed to flutter around him.

"...and the flapping of its wings brought chaos into the world, and the chaos brought me here." He vaporised the shards with another wave.

Under her mask, Luka gritted her teeth. "Go home, elemental," she said. "There is no reason for you to come here, or to bring your madness here."

"Oh?" the man said. He paused for another lick. "Why should **you** even **care**? Perhaps you fancy yourself the guardian of this pathetic human city?"

"It is merely... my feeding ground." Luka said. "I merely wish to preserve my feeding ground. I would prefer that you left my prey undamaged."

The man tut-tut'ed condescendingly. "Vampires are such terrible liars. I've been 'watching' you for a day or two, ever since I happened to sense you here. I've seen you and your pet human."

Luka remained silent, but she quailed inside. _Oh no,_ Luka thought. _Oh no._

"And I believe she lives in the structure beneath our feet... why, **here** comes your pet human **now**. Wouldn't it be simply **lovely** if she joined us?"

"**NO!**" Luka shouted into the wind.

* * *

Miku was stomping along a sidewalk and struggling into the wind, several meters from the residence hall doors, when the mist-heavy wind threw her high into the air like a small green leaf.

Miku screamed.

* * *

Gumi stood at the window of her room, gazing through a corner of the window where she had temporarily pulled back the black paper. She stared out into the swirling gray mist of the storm.

_Come on, Miku_, she thought. _It's dangerous out there. Hurry up and come back. Please._

A green shape blew past the window. Gumi gasped. _Was that... __**Miku**__?_ she thought.

_...no, that would be __**crazy**__! It must have been a branch, or a piece of cardboard, or... or..._

_Oh, come __**on**__, Miku! Where __**are**__ you?..._

* * *

An empty cappucchino cup slipped and fell from Miki's hands, and shattered on the clean tile floor behind the coffee-house counter.

Miki went down on her knees to pick up the pieces. She picked up the largest piece, still with the handle, but paused and studied it.

The coffee-house cups would have seemed identical to most people. But with her photographic memory, Miki recognized the minor imperfections in its surface, and recalled when she had last seen it.

_This was Miku's cup,_ Miki thought. _This was the cup Miku used, the last time she had her special cappuccino... her favorite drink._

Miki set down the broken handle, bowed her head, clasped her hands and prayed.

* * *

Miku fell on the roof none too gently, closer to the man than to Luka. She struggled to her hands and knees, shaking with fear like a leaf.

"**LET. HER. GO.**" Luka snarled.

The man casually took a large bite from his popsicle. "Make me," he said.

Throwing caution to the wind, Luka charged at the man... and found herself thrown into the mist, much the same as Miku, but much higher.

Luka twisted to and fro, trying to right herself. A fall from such great heights would badly injure even a mature and strong vampire, if Luka could not land on her feet. But she had no purchase to right herself. She was trapped in the mist.

The man's voice cut through the wind, and Luka could hear him as if she were still on the roof. "Shall I impale you on one of those poles with the wires? I could drive a stake ten meters tall through your chest... No, that would be too quick."

Luka was suddenly borne even higher. The clouds began to break up around her. "Ooh, how about **this**?" the man said. "I could strip away your clothes, encase your body in clear ice, and bear you up to burn away in the light of the sun. Just imagine how your death throes would be prolonged... how you would burn and freeze simultaneously, utterly paralyzed in unimaginable agony, until your flesh finally turned to charcoal..."

For the first time in a very long time, Luka knew mindless fear. She began to writhe in a blind panic.

"Oh, this is **boring**," the man said. A moment later, Luka found herself back on the roof, on her hands and knees and trembling in front of the man, much the same again as Miku.

"The lowest chamber of this structure is below ground level," the man said, referring to the basement of Miku's residence hall. "You will be somewhat stronger if you are away from the sun, yes?

"If you can think of a more **entertaining** way to **die**, come to this chamber and show me, and perhaps I shall let your pet human live, albeit not unharmed. But if you cannot? I shall freeze her body slowly from the inside out, and then I shall come for **you**, and **then** I will destroy this city.

"I shall give you a few minutes to plan your own death, vampire. And I expect to be entertained. Do **not** disappoint me." The man and Miku disappeared in a burst of wind and a swirl of gray mist.

Luka kneeled, cast aside her sunglasses, held her gloved hands over her eyes, and wept tears of humiliation and impotent rage.

* * *

Miku was cold.

She slowly opened her eyes. Her eyelids felt like lead. She trembled only slightly, too cold to shiver properly. She had to struggle just to draw breath.

She was standing, but she could not move her limbs. She gradually realized that she was frozen in place, her back against a bare cinder-block wall.

Miku worked her mouth a few times before she managed to speak. "Where?..." she croaked. She was in a well-lit room, but her vision was blurred.

The elemental stood nearby, idly forming a tall abstract ice sculpture. Upon hearing Miku's voice, he crushed it with a gesture, and walked up to Miku.

"You are still alive?" he asked in his sing-song voice. "Not that it matters. Not that **you** matter. But you really **should** have died by now, you silly girl."

And then, the elemental raised an eyebrow, and leaned in closer. He seemed to concentrate on Miku's face, as if he could see something Miku could not.

"...you are not **human**?" he said in surprise. "I see! This is why you still live! And this must be why you are the vampire's pet. But what **are** you, girl?"

"What?..." Miku gasped. She couldn't believe her ears. Was this only the ramblings of a madman, or had she gone crazy herself? Or was she really?...

"You do not know?" the elemental said. "Perhaps your true nature has been sealed, or perhaps it simply has not yet manifested. You are still young...

"Oh well. Too late. I guess you'll never know now."

Miku wanted to cry, but tears would not come. "Why?..." she whispered.

"Why?" the elemental asked with a mocking smile. "Why does an iceberg crush a ship? Why does a nor'easter wash a village into the sea? Why does a glacier slowly but surely reduce a mountain to gravel?..."

"This is what I am, girl. This is what I **do**. And this is what I **want** to do. You, and your boring vampire mistress, and your pathetic human friends, all want to live, and to build... But I want to **destroy** everything you have built, and then I want you to **die**."

Miku had no strength left, and on hearing these words, she lost all hope. Her eyes rolled back, and she slumped as far as the ice holding her permitted.

"You could say," the elemental said to himself, "that some men just want to watch the world freeze."


	9. The Iceman Cometh 2

This contains violence and adult themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Luka burst into Miku and Gumi's residence-hall room, not bothering to knock. Gumi, seated at her desk, looked up with a start.

"We need to talk," Luka said, as she tossed her mask and sunglasses aside.

"Miku's in trouble, isn't she?" Gumi asked.

"Yes—"

"And this crazy weather... this is more that just a freak storm, isn't it?"

"Yes—"

"And this has something to do with your being a vampire, doesn't it?"

Luka blinked. "...ah. Correction: We need to talk, but about fewer things than I first expected."

* * *

Luka sat at Miku's desk, next to Gumi, and tried to explain what had happened in human terms.

"It is an arctic water elemental," Luka said, "something like a winter storm personified. It is much further south than it should be, and it is greatly weakened, but it is still a fearsome thing."

"Why it is here?" Gumi asked. "It was so hot just a few days ago."

"I do not know much about these things," Luka said, "only what my own psychic abilities tell me. But either it is a cruel and fickle thing by nature, or else it has gone mad. And I fear that my presence has attracted it to this city."

"I'm sure it isn't your fault," Gumi said quickly. "And you must be really strong. You can take care of it, right?"

Luka's face fell. She looked away from Gumi. "Gumi... I have already tried to fight it, in a fit of rage. And as you young humans might say, it kicked my **ass**."

"What?" Gumi said in alarm. "But— I don't know anything about real vampires, but in the folklore I've read, they're the strongest of all supernatural creatures!"

"Perhaps I am stronger than most," Luka said softly, "but this is an **elemental**. No vampire could hope to defeat in battle a thing with the strength of a hurricane."

"Then... what are we going to do?"

"In a few minutes," Luka said even more softly, "I must face the elemental again, because it still holds Miku hostage. And unless I am **very** lucky, I shall be destroyed."

Gumi began to cry. "No! You can't! There has to be **something** we can do!"

"I have some small hope," Luka said. "Again, this elemental is much weaker than if it were in its own environment. And madmen are extremely dangerous, but they are also careless, and they make careless mistakes. And... I do have a plan. However, you should not expect to see me again—"

Luka was cut off by a sudden embrace from Gumi. "Oh, Gumi!..." said Luka.

"How can you be so calm?" Gumi sobbed. "How can you just sit there and say you're going to die?"

Luka pushed Gumi back and held her by the shoulders. "Dear Gumi. What else can I do? I cannot flee. The elemental would... kill Miku, and then come for me anyway. And if I did escape? I could not live as a coward for all eternity, knowing that I had abandoned Miku— my love— to die alone.

"My choice is clear— or rather, I have no choice. I must go and face my destiny, and do my best. And if my best is not good enough... I have already lived far longer than most, and I am grateful that I did live long enough to know Miku. And you."

"Now I wish I had told you sooner that I figured out you were a vampire," Gumi sniffed. "But you and Miku were so happy. I didn't want to risk that."

"I rather wish you had, myself," Luka said, standing up. "But that is hindsight, and our time is now at an end."

Gumi also stood up. "...what are you doing?" Luka asked quietly.

"I'm co- coming with you," Gumi stammered.

"Oh **no** you are **not**!" Luka said sternly. "You must flee this building! And to be safe, you should leave this city!"

Gumi rubbed her eyes, and then looked Luka in the face. "Luka?... I know I'm only a human girl, and a cry-baby at that. But... all that stuff you just said about running away? That goes **double** for me. I've known Miku for **way** longer than you, and I love her too. If there's even the slightest chance that I can do anything at all? I can't abandon her either."

Luka did not immediately answer. But she softly growled, and Gumi imagined that her eyes were glowing red. Gumi took a step back and held up her open hands. "Luka! Please!"

And then, Luka held her face in her hands. "Ngh... forgive me, Gumi. You are right. And you are an adult, and I have no right to order you like a child. You must choose your own path.

"But let me make this perfectly clear. I do not expect to be able to save myself, let alone protect you. If you follow me, you will quite possibly die at the hands of a monster. And it might not be a quick and painless death. Do you understand, Gumi?"

Gumi began to cry again. "Yuh— yes," she stammered. "Oh!... Why can't I be brave like you?"

Luka reached out and embraced Gumi in return. "You are," Luka said softly. "Only a brave soul would have chosen this path, Gumi. And I am honored to face my destiny with you."

Gumi and Luka held each other for a moment, taking what comfort they could from each other.

Luka stood back and gave Gumi her best smile. "Dear Gumi... my friend. Hold your head high, keep love in your heart, and know that what you do is right. Ready?"

Not trusting herself to speak, Gumi nodded quickly.

"Then get your heaviest winter coat, and follow me."

* * *

Luka and Gumi raced down through the nearest stairwell, all the way down to the bottom landing. They ran up to a closed basement door.

Gumi could already feel the intense cold behind the door. "Should we try to sneak up on the bad guy?" she asked Luka.

Instead of answering, Luka briefly strained against the closed door, and then tore it open, destroying part of the doorframe in the process.

"...oh," said Gumi. "I guess not."

"It will know that I am coming," Luka said as she entered the basement, "as surely as I knew when it first arrived. Prepare yourself, Gumi."

Gumi followed Luka into the relatively small basement, expecting to find some unimaginable horror. But much to her surprise, there was only a rather thin young man in a white coat and blue scarf. Gumi very briefly thought that he was actually quite handsome. But when he looked at her and Luka, Gumi saw only coldness in his eyes.

And then, Gumi saw Miku frozen to the wall behind the man. To her credit, Gumi did not cry out. But tears came quickly.

"I see you have acquired another pet human," the elemental said to Luka. "Is she here to help you kill yourself for me?"

Luka did not answer his taunt directly. "I am here, elemental. If your words have any honor, let the other girl go now."

"Oh, very well," the man said. "I was hoping the silly girl would do me the simple courtesy of dying by herself, but she still lives. And I must honor my words, much the same as you."

He gestured towards Miku, and the ice holding her shattered into dust. Miku slumped to the cold concrete basement floor.

Gumi took a step towards Miku, but paused and glanced at Luka. She smiled and nodded at Gumi. "Yes. Please take Miku to a place of safety. Thank you, Gumi."

Trying not to think of those words as the last that Luka would say to her, Gumi ran around the man and kneeled at Miku's side.

_Oh no_, Gumi thought, as she struggled with Miku's body. _Oh no. Her face is pale. Oh no. She's covered in cuts and bruises. Oh no..._

Luka and the elemental stared at each other while Gumi pulled Miku away as quickly but carefully as she could. She dragged Miku backwards through the open basement door and out of sight.

"...well?" the man said to Luka. "I am waiting."

Luka steeled herself. _I am grateful that Gumi is no longer here_, she thought. _I am grateful that Gumi will not see this._

"...yes," Luka said to the man, taking a first step towards him. "We are not human, nor are we of the same kind. But... you are a man, and I am a woman. And while I cannot offer you a challenge in battle, I can offer you... other things."

Luka was humiliated beyond words. But this was her plan, and she had resigned herself to this. She took another step towards the man, and opened the front of her black clothing, exposing much of her chest.

"I have been told that I am very beautiful," Luka said, walking within arm's length of the man. The cold was so intense around his body that even she could feel it now. "Instead of killing me... will you not sample my beauty for yourself?"

"...interesting!" the man said. "I can feel your fear and humiliation. Yes, this will do quite nicely. You may pleasure me, vampire. If you please me sufficiently, I shall grant you a quick death after it is done."

Luka took one last step forward and embraced the man. She felt his chill embrace of death... and smiled. _Got you_, she thought to herself. She pushed his scarf aside, bared her fangs and plunged them into his neck.

The man flinched. "What?... You actually seek to feed on me? You fool. There is nothing but ice water in my veins...

"Wait. What is this pleasurable feeling? Is this what all your victims feel?... I see. Yes, this is even more interesting. You may continue."

Luka closed her eyes for what she believed to be the last time. And then, she began to do something that she had never done before.

The man quickly realized that Luka had tricked him, after all. "What is this warmth that I feel?... You are not seeking to feed on me! You are actually vomiting your energies into my body instead! Are you trying to take your own life, you beautiful fool? What other possible reason could you have to..."

And then, the man happened to look at his own hand. He saw that the icy flesh of the tips of his fingers had already melted away. His fingers were melting so quickly that he could watch them shrink.

And for the first time in his eons of existence, the elemental felt fear. But instead of pushing Luka away, or struggling at all... he laughed.

"Oh, this is good! This is very good!" he cried. "You have actually inflicted damage on my corporeal form! You may continue, vampire. Let us see how much damage you can do to me before you die!"

Luka clutched at the man desperately as she continued her reverse feeding. She already felt her strength fading.

"And even if you should succeed in melting this body entirely?" the man said. "The floor of this chamber has a drainage system. The water of my corporeal form will flow back into the earth, where I can draw upon the elemental energies of this world and be reborn. It will take many years, but I shall be reborn as surely as winter follows summer. And **you** will be **dead**."

_Damn_, Luka thought. _So I bought only a few years of peace with my life. But it should be at least a human lifetime. Miku... and Gumi... will not live long enough to see this monster again. For that... for my love... and for my friend... I am grateful._

Luka had lost all feeling in her face and arms. She saw a dull red behind her closed eyes, and she heard a roaring in her ears. She knew that she was truly dying now... and worse, that she was also pushing herself down into bloodlust.

But, thinking of nothing else but their duel to the death, neither Luka nor the elemental realized that Gumi had returned.


	10. The Iceman Cometh 3

Let's throw in a Kaiko cameo while we're at it.

This contains violence and adult themes. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Gumi returned to the open basement doorway— and froze. She saw Luka and the man locked in an embrace that was obviously a duel to the death.

And then, she heard the elemental speak. "Oh, this is good! This is very good!" he cried. "You have actually inflicted damage on my corporeal form! You may continue, vampire. Let us see how much damage you can do to me before you die!"

Assuming that Luka the vampire was feeding on the man, Gumi silently wished Luka strength and cheered her on. _Get him, Luka!_ she thought. _Get him good! Suck him dry!_

But then, Gumi's spirits fell when she heard the man speak again. "And even if you should succeed in melting this body entirely," the man said, "the floor of this chamber has a drainage system. The water of my corporeal form will flow back into the earth, where I can draw upon the elemental energies of this world and be reborn. It will take many years, but I shall be reborn as surely as winter follows summer. And **you** will be **dead**."

Gumi looked down at the finished concrete floor under Luka and the man, and saw a trickle of blue-tinted water begin to run from a puddle under his feet. She looked across the floor, and saw one of a few small open drains in the floor. The closest drain was several meters from the man, but the floor had been sloped so that it would drain properly, and Gumi realized that she had only a minute or so to act before the trickle of water reached the drain.

Gumi's brain automatically went into overdrive. _Think, Gumi!_ she thought. _You're supposed to be the smart one! It's all up to you now! THINK!_

Looking around the basement, she saw a handyman's workbench in one corner, with a small red canister at one end. _That's probably a dry-vac,_ Gumi thought, _but it isn't plugged in, and I don't have time to find an outlet or an extension cord. I have to cover that drain first!_

She ran up to the workbench and frantically rummaged through the equipment and supplies piled up on it. _No, this stuff won't help,_ she thought. _No... no... no... YES!_

Meanwhile, the elmental slumped to his knees— because his arms and legs had melted away to his elbows and knees. Luka fell to her knees with him, but somehow still held both of them upright.

"Die, vampire!" the man said eagerly. "I want to see you die! You have proved to be the most worthy adversary I have ever faced, and I shall relish your death as none before!"

Luka did not respond at all. She imagined that she could feel her own body shrivel and decay, and she found herself wishing for her own death as well. But she gathered what strength she had left, and poured it into her reverse feeding.

And then, the man suddenly heard strange ripping sounds. He looked up past Luka's shoulder to see the second human tear several strips of duct tape from a thick roll with her teeth, and then press them firmly over his escape route.

The man's eyes widened as the water from his body began to pool over the covered drain. He tried to shake Luka off, but he realized that he had waited too long. His limbs were nearly gone, along with most of his body's strength.

Gumi was far too terrified to gloat, or to give the man the finger. But she took a moment to glare at him silently. _Never underestimate an engineer with a roll of duct tape,_ she thought. And then she turned and ran back for the dry-vac.

The elemental realized that, not only had he been defeated by a vampire, but also that he was about to be captured by a pathetic human. As Gumi plugged in the dry-vac and carried it back towards him, he began to laugh hysterically.

And just as Gumi switched on the dry-vac, what was left of his body suddenly collapsed into a large puddle of bluish water. Gumi went to work, and quicky captured most of the elemental water before it even reached the taped drain.

Gumi switched off the dry-vac and sighed in relief. And then, she turned to Luka, who had fallen to one side when the elemental collapsed.

She kneeled in front of Luka, gently shook Luka's shoulders, and then began to lift her pink hair from where it had fallen over her face. "Luka! Are you OK? What should I— *_**GASP**_*!"

"DON'T LOOK AT ME!" Luka shrieked. In an instant, she was up on her knees in front of Gumi, gripping Gumi's arms so tightly that it hurt. "CLOSE YOUR EYES! DON'T LOOK AT MY FACE!"

Her triumph over the elemental forgotten, Gumi silently trembled with fear. She had expected to see Luka's beautiful face, but instead, she had caught a glimpse of a decaying corpse.

"You STUPID GIRL!" Luka growled, also trembling with weakness and the doomed effort to control her bloodlust. "Why did you come back within my reach? I could have willed myself to die peacefully, and you could have lived! But now, I MUST take your blood! ALL OF IT!"

Gumi realized that neither she nor Luka could stop what was about to happen. Tears came to her eyes immediately, but she felt the unnatural calm of a pedestrian who has just seen an oncoming bus too late to escape from its path.

_So I'm going to die at the hands of a monster after all,_ Gumi thought. _It's just not the monster that I first expected._

"I understand," Gumi said quietly. "It's OK, Luka. It's not your fault. Go ahead and do what you have to do."

Luka's voice briefly took on a more human tone. "...forgive me, Gumi," she said. "This is going to hurt."

Tears ran down Gumi's face. But her last thoughts were not of herself. "Take care of Miku," she said.

Luka howled in anguish like an animal. She tore Gumi's coat and clothing open, and sank her teeth deep into Gumi's shoulder.

Gumi screamed.

* * *

Gumi slowly opened her eyes, and looked up at what appeared to be the bottom of her own bunk-bed. "Aw, **man**," she whined weakly. "I was hoping that, when I got to the after-life, I could get the top bunk again."

"You'll rest in my lower bunk and **like** it, you big nerd," a familiar voice said. "And if I can't leave you alone for five minutes without you going and getting yourself killed, then I'm never taking my eyes off you again."

Gumi turned her head to see a weary and teary-eyed Miku sitting at her side. "Gosh, Miku," she said, "you look terrible. You look almost as bad as I feel."

"Here." Miku held a juice carton to Gumi's mouth. "Drink. Yeah, Luka patched us up with her vampire voodoo the best she could, but we're both gonna need some down time. Be careful with your shoulder. It's gonna be plenty sore."

"What happened?" Gumi asked between swallows.

"I woke up in the stairwell, limped back down into the basement, and found Luka mauling you," Miku said quietly. "She was already human again, but she was still out of it. I pulled her off you just in time, and then I let her take some more blood from **me** until she came to her senses. All three of us are 'running on empty', but we should be OK as long as we don't have to save the world again for a few days."

"How did you pull Luka away from me?" asked Gumi. "I didn't think there was any point in resisting her when she was like... that."

"I don't know," Miku said. "I'm not even supposed to be alive... and I might not even be **human**. Gumi, I'm really sorry I didn't tell you about Luka or this stuff before now, but I have a lot of questions too, and we're gonna have to hold a 'Team Meeting' later with Luka.

"But since you're awake now, someone wants to talk to you. And don't be scared, OK? She's friendly."

Miku stood up, and then a female clone of the elemental took her place. "Hello, Gumi," she said softly. "I wanted to thank you for capturing my brother, and to apologize for what he tried to do to your friends. He has always been poorly behaved, but this tantrum was inexcusable."

"Oh, wow," Gumi said. "Are you really his sister? You sure don't act like him."

"We are literally polar opposites, both in geography and in personality," the elemental said. "I am sorry that I could not be of help myself, but Antarctica is a **very** long ways from here, and I currently have little more strength than a human. And it was all over by the time I arrived.

"I also wanted to reassure you that he will not trouble you again." The elemental held up a small solid block of ice. "This is the water of his corporeal form that you captured. Perhaps a few thousand years spent as a brick in the wall of my igloo will improve his manners."

Gumi gulped. "I almost feel sorry for him... Almost."

"I hope for your sake that we do not meet again," the elemental said with a gentle smile. "But if you should ever find yourself at the South Pole, please stop by and say hello." The elemental leaned in and kissed Gumi's forehead, giving Gumi a cold but pleasant shiver.

The elemental stood up. "I shall take my leave now," she said to everybody in the room. "Thank you again, and please take care of yourselves."

After the elemental left, Gumi raised a hand to get Miku's attention. "Hey Miku, is Luka here? I wanna talk to her too."

Miku grimaced. "Alright. But be careful, Gumi. She's still **really** upset about what happened." She turned away from Gumi and spoke towards the far corner of the room. "Luka? She wants to talk to you."

The room remained silent. "...Luka, **please**," Miku said in an unusually emotional voice. "You have to deal with this sooner or later."

And then, Luka slowly took Miku's chair. "Guh- Gumi..." she stammered as she began to cry.

"Hi, Luka," said Gumi with a smile. "I'm glad you're better now... Oh, please don't cry. That's **my** job."

Luka held Gumi's hand. "How can you even bear to look at me?" she sobbed. "After what you saw... after what I did to you..."

"Everybody has a bad side," Gumi said. "Even me. If you hang around with me long enough, you'll see my bad side too.

Gumi began to cry too. "But I hope that... after you see my bad side... you'll still want to see... my good side again."

Luka leaned down and pressed Gumi's hand to her wet cheek. "Oh... **Gumi**... my dear **friend**... " she gasped between sobs.

Miku stood by with a happy smile, and brushed tears from her own eyes. But she was startled by a frantic pounding at the door.

"Oh, good grief!" Miku grumbled, as she walked up to the door and opened it. "It's getting so you can't even have a highly-emotional reconciliation around here— OOF!"

Miku was glomped by a small rain-soaked mop of long wild red hair. "I'm sorry Miku I know this is weird but ever since I saw you at the coffee-shop I couldn't stop thinking about you and I just knew something was wrong and I was so worried about you and I was worried about Ms. Miku's Friend too and I just had to come and see if both of you were alright and I'm so happy that you're alright WHAAAAAH!"

"Thanks, Miki," said Miku with a still-tearful smile. "But if you came here to cry, you're gonna have to take a number and wait in line."


	11. Ten Minute Penalty

This takes place three or four days after the previous chapter.

This contains adult themes and gratuitous creepy adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku returned to her residence-hall room after her last class of the day. Gumi was studying at her desk, and she turned around as Miku opened the door. "Hey, Gumi-bear," Miku said quietly. "Is Luka still 'down in the dumps'?"

Gumi gestured to a pink and black lump of vampire, curled up in a fetal position and facing the wall, on Miku's lower bunk-bed. "She hasn't even moved since this morning," Gumi said. "I'd think she was dead, if I didn't know she was undead."

Miku sat on her bed, just behind Luka. "Oh, **Luuu**-kaah," she said in the most enticing voice she could muster. "I've got some nice fresh warm type-oh-so-positive blood for you in my body. And it's chock-full of corpuscles. I just made it myself."

"...I am not hungry," Luka said in a small sad voice, without moving at all.

Miku glanced at Gumi, and then she tried something else. "Want me to strip you naked, tie you up, and pleasure you until you lose yourself in a multi-orgasmic delirium of kinky lesbian sex?"

"...maybe later," Luka said.

"Oh no," Gumi said. "She must be **really** depressed to have turned **that** down."

Miku sighed and rested a hand on Luka's shoulder. "Luka, please don't brood like this. We've got some important stuff to talk about, but we can't really do that until you pull out of this funk—"

"I KNOW!" Luka shouted angrily, loud enough to make both Miku and Gumi recoil.

And then, Luka spun around and hugged Miku's waist. "Oh, Miku. Gumi. I am sorry. It seems I can only hurt the ones who love me..."

"**Stop** that," Miku said firmly. "You know it isn't true—"

"But it is!" Luka said, as tears came again. "Within weeks of my finding you and Gumi, you nearly died at the hands of a monster, and Gumi's blood is on my own hands! I told you on our second date that I never wished to experience bloodlust again, but both Gumi and I have experienced it again!

"I know what I should do. I should leave you for your own safety, and for my own peace of mind. And I should emulate the ancients, and leave this place, and find a refuge where I can be alone forever... But I CANNOT! After knowing your love, and your friendship, I cannot endure eternity alone!

"Oh, Miku. Gumi. I am so ashamed of myself. I know what I should do, but I am too weak to do it..."

Miku glanced at Gumi again with a worried expression, and then she reassured Luka the best she could. "First, don't you **dare** go **anywhere**, unless you really do want to hurt the ones who love you. That would hurt us more than anything else you might do.

"Second, you are **not weak**. You have been through three hundred years of **hell**, and this past week **really** wasn't so hot. But still, here you are. If I had been through a tenth of what you've been through, I would have already given myself 'The Big Sunburn'.

"And third, please remember that you don't have to deal with your problems by yourself. You're not alone anymore. You have friends now, and we want to help you. If there's anything that either of us can do, **tell** us."

Gumi was silently thoughtful as Miku spoke. After Miku finished, she seemed to come to a decision, and then she raised her hand for attention. "Actually, I already know what I can do for Luka."

Miku and Luka turned to look at her, expecting a revelation of wisdom beyond Gumi's years.

Gumi swallowed heavily and gathered up all of her nerve. "Luka, I want you to drink my blood again."

Miku and Luka continued to look at her, but now, as if she had lost her mind.

"Hear me out!" Gumi said. "Miku! It's usually no big deal when Luka drinks your blood, right? I mean, you were even joking about it, right?"

"Well, yeah," Miku said, "but—"

"And Luka! You're still feeling guilty about what happened in the basement, right? Because you were talking about bloodlust and stuff, right?"

"Yes, Gumi," said Luka, "but—"

"Isn't it obvious?" Gumi said. "Things are gonna be weird between us until you drink my blood **properly**!"

"That **is** logical," Miku thought out loud, "and yet, that is a sentence that you just don't hear very often."

* * *

Miku, Gumi and Luka sat together in a row along the edge of Miku's lower bunk-bed. "Nervous?" Miku asked Gumi with a kind smile.

"Utterly terrified," Gumi said honestly. "But we need to do this, and to get this out of the way."

Miku eyed Gumi's heavy long-sleeved sweatshirt. "You probably should change into a blouse that opens at the neck—"

Gumi pulled off her sweatshirt and tossed it aside, leaving herself in only a bra. "No reason to be shy. I'm about to let another woman give me a 'third-degree hickey'... Miku? When you do this with Luka? Does it usually, um... hurt?"

"There's a little pinch at the start," Miku said, "but it's no worse than an injection, and the pain doesn't last. And **then**..."

Miku cut herself off. "Wait a minute. Luka? Have you ever told her about the 'consent effect'?"

"No," a still-depressed Luka said quietly. "I have not been in the mood to talk of such things."

Gumi raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"I'll let you find out for yourself," Miku said mischievously. "She surprised me with it, and I don't wanna spoil the surprise for you. It's a **good** surprise."

"Um, OK," said Gumi. "...hold my hand?"

"Sure." Miku linked fingers with Gumi.

"Thanks, Miku. Go ahead, Luka."

Luka turned towards Gumi, and held one hand under Gumi's jaw. "Thank you for this, Gumi. You are a dear friend. And I am sorry to have lied to Miku, but now that I am looking at you like this, I find that I **am** quite hungry, after all."

"Bon appétit," Gumi said with a grin.

Luka pressed her lips against Gumi's neck and nuzzled her, and then broke skin with her fangs.

Gumi closed her eyes and winced. "NNNGH!" Tears came to her eyes immediately.

"Ssshh," Miku said. "It's OK, Gumi. You're doing great. And the hard part is already over."

Gumi opened her eyes and looked at Miku... and then she silently widened her eyes.

"You're starting to feel it now, right?" Miku said softly. "Don't fight it. Let it overwhelm you."

Gumi's eyes rolled back slightly, and her mouth fell open. She seemed to be trying to form words, but she could only work her mouth like a fish out of water. Miku felt Gumi shiver, and she held Gumi's hand very tightly.

Miku was entranced by Gumi's reaction, due to both her homosexuality and the love of her friend. _Oh wow,_ Miku thought to herself. _Gumi is so beautiful when she's like this. She's gonna make some guy so happy someday._

After a short time, Luka leaned back, holding a hand over her mouth. "I am done," she said. "Thank you again, Gumi. Your blood is deliciously sweet. I expected no less from a sweet girl like you."

"So?" Miku asked. "Whatcha think?"

Gumi began to smile. She smiled so widely that Miku thought that the top of her head might fall off. And then, without any warning, she threw her arms out into the air. "WOO HOO!" she whooped.

Luka and Miku stood up from the bunk-bed to avoid Gumi's arms. But Gumi took no notice of them. She rolled around on Miku's lower bunk, flailing her arms and legs, and laughed until she snorted.

"Call me crazy," Miku said, "but I think she **liked** it."

"Gumi's awkward exuberance is strangely endearing," Luka noted.

"I think the word you're looking for is 'a-dork-able'," Miku said. "Y'know, I hate to admit it, but that big nerd was right. This was between you and her, but even I feel like a weight has been lifted."

"Yes," Luka said, "and I must admit that I also feel better with a 'full stomach'. Thank you for tolerating my moodiness, Miku. I shall try to be better company from now on."

"That's what girlfriends are for," Miku said modestly. "...hey, Gumi! Calm down, would ya? If you keep that up, you're gonna blow a gasket!"

Gumi was finally able to form words again. "Oh WOW!" she cried. "That was INCREDIBLE! I feel like I just rode a roller coaster with my vibrator set on 'high'!"

"Too Much Information, Gumi," said Miku. "But actually, that's a really good description of it. I never really knew how to describe it, myself."

"PLEASE tell me that we can do that AGAIN sometime!" Gumi begged both Luka and Miku.

"I certainly would not mind," Luka said. "But I fear that doing so would make Miku jealous."

"Right now," Miku admitted, "I am so jealous that I could freak. But I'll deal with it. If I can't be generous with Gumi, then I don't deserve Best Friend Forever status."

Gumi jumped to her feet and gave her friends a surprisingly powerful group hug. "I LOVE BOTH OF YOU SO MUCH!" she shouted with uninhibited joy.

"We love you too," Miku said, "but seriously, turn it down a notch. We're living on a floor with extended 'quiet hours', you know."

"Oh, who CARES!" Gumi cried. "I've had enough of studying for a while!"

"Who are you, and what have you done with Gumi?" asked Luka.

"C'mon, you gloomy goobers!" said Gumi. "Let's have FUN! Let's dance in the streets, and swim in the fountains, and make out with the nearest hottie! Let's PARTY! WOO HOO!"

Again without warning, Gumi bolted through the door and slammed it shut behind her, leaving a bemused Miku and Luka behind.

Luka glanced back at Gumi's discarded sweatshirt. "Um, she isn't wearing a..."

"Yeah," said an amused Miku. "She'll remember that herself in a few seconds."

They stared at the closed door, and then Miku counted down. "Five. Four. Three. Two. One—"

An **extremely** red-faced Gumi quietly opened the door, came back in, closed the door, and stood with her back against the door. "You know," she said to Miku, "you **could** have come after me."

"HELLO? Raging lesbian here!" a smirking Miku said. "If you want to run around without a shirt on, I'm not gonna stop you!"

Gumi scowled. "**Miku**..." she growled.

Miku frowned. "This wasn't **my** fault, Gumi!... Well, I guess it was. I'm the 'Team Leader', and I **am** responsible for keeping our weirdness private.

"Tell you what. Since I let you embarrass yourself, and since I watched you 'lose it' with Luka? I'll take a ten-minute penalty of your choice, and you can embarrass me in front of my girlfriend."

"A penalty game? You're on!" Gumi forgot her anger and regained her enthusiasm. "We haven't done this for a long time! I've gotta make it good! Hmm..."

Her face lit up. "I have an idea, but I should talk about it with Luka first."

Miku gulped. "Guh- go ahead," she stammered.

Gumi and Luka huddled up and whispered, as if they were planning a football play. Miku became even more nervous when Gumi gestured with her hands to explain her plan.

And then, Gumi and Luka slowly turned back to face Miku with identical bone-chilling merciless smiles. Miku whimpered.

In an instant, all three friends were back on Miku's lower bunk. Luka held Miku's shoulders from behind with unbreakable vampiric strength, and Gumi kneeled in front of Miku and began to pull off Miku's clothes.

"Hey!" said Miku. "At least buy me dinner first!"

"We're only going down to your underwear," Gumi explained. "I hereby declare a ten-minute unilateral suspension of our ban on tickle-fights."

"For TEN MINUTES?" Miku cried. "I'll DIE! LUKA! HELP!"

"Once agreed to, penalties must be served," Luka said sternly, but with a twinkle in her eye. "And I shall assist Gumi in embarrassing you. I also find myself in high spirits now, and I am not **always** submissive."

"TWO ON ONE?" Miku gasped. "I REALLY WILL DIE!"

Gumi pulled off her own jeans. "You know," she said, "all female college room-mates, gay and straight, are required to have at least one tickle-fight in their underwear. I think it's a universal law of perversion. We might as well get that out of the way too."

"O, that it should have come to this!" Miku said melodramatically. "My faithful sidekick, and my loving girlfriend, conspiring to torture me! But I'll get you for this, do you hear! I'll get you for BWAH HA HA HA HA HA! BWAH HA HA HA!..."

"Not for the next nine minutes and fifty seconds, you won't," Gumi said happily.


	12. Team Meeting 1

I'm surprised that so many comments have asked me not to use bold font to emphasize words. I've been doing that for years, and it's never been an issue before now. But, since I've received this criticism repeatedly, I'll try to do without from now on.

And thank you for the comments, by the way. This has become the most popular fic I've ever written. But then, one can hardly go wrong with vampires and cute perverted yuri.

This contains extremely silly random tangents (this is what happens when you pad a single scene out to TWO CHAPTERS) and some adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Since Luka was no longer brooding, Miku had called a "Team Meeting" to discuss many important matters with Luka and Gumi. And as usual, Miku had gone all out— she had reserved a small meeting room in a nearby hall, late in the evening so that Luka could attend unmasked, and she had asked her friends to observe a "business-formal" dress code for the meeting.

Luka neither bathed nor did laundry as often as a mortal, and she had very few personal possessions in general. She still wore her usual black skirt, black tights and low-heeled black boots. But she had traded her loose hooded sweater for an elegant black turtle-neck and an ornate necklace. She had also tied back her long pink hair into a business-woman's pony-tail.

Gumi had followed Miku's dress-code request conscientiously. She wore a dark suit jacket over a crisp white blouse with a scarf-tie, a black pencil skirt, hose and polished closed-toe heels. Her only indulgence was a cute cartoon carrot pin on her lapel.

Meanwhile, a flamboyant Miku redefined "business-formal" for herself, and simply wore a man's narrow necktie over her cheerleader's sleeveless blouse and pleated skirt. She somehow looked like a futuristic Japanese idol singer, or even a mascot character for voice-synthesis computer software.

Miku stood at the head of the single table in the small room, and Gumi (with a stack of notebooks and loose papers) and Luka (with an old-fashioned clipboard) sat at the first chair on either side. And just as they took their seats, Miki knocked at the door, wearing her usual barista's black vest and bow tie, and carrying a coffee thermos, paper cups and a small box of conference-table pastries.

As Miki poured the coffee, Miku cleared her throat. "This meeting of 'Team Miku' is hereby called to order. Before we begin, the Chair would like to thank the representative from SF-A2 Coffee for personally delivering our refreshments."

Gumi, Luka and Miku gave Miki a polite round of golf-claps. "Thanks!" Miki said happily. "Can I stay for your meeting? My shift is over, and this looks like fun."

Miku frowned. "Um... Sorry, Miki, but we were going to talk about some really personal stuff—"

"Oh, that's alright!" Miki said brightly. "I already know Ms. Miku's Friend is a vampire, if that's what you're worried about."

The room went so quiet that Miki imagined she could hear individual air molecules colliding. "Is something wrong?" she asked innocently.

Gumi turned to glare at Miku with Nerd Rage turned up to eleven. "It wasn't me!" a panicking Miku said. "I swear I didn't breathe a word!"

Luka closed her eyes and rubbed her temples, as if she had a headache. "Perhaps we should abandon all pretense of secrecy now," she growled, "and erect a billboard along the highway that reads VAMPIRE: NEXT EXIT!"

Gumi quickly checked some figures in one of her notebooks. "Hmm... no, I'm afraid we don't have the advertising budget this month to cover the expense of a roadside billboard."

"Nobody told me," Miki said. "I knew it as soon as Miku invited Ms. Miku's Friend into the coffee-shop. I expected her to tear out my throat right from the start. No offense."

"No offense taken," Luka said, sadly but sincerely. "I get that a lot."

"That's amazing, Miki," said a genuinely impressed Gumi. "You figured it out much faster than I did."

"It was obvious, Gumi." Without warning, Miki leaned in on the seated Luka, stuck her fingers in Luka's mouth, and pried open Luka's teeth, as if she were checking the age of a race horse. "Just look at those pronounced canines!"

"'iki?" said Luka. "'leash 'ake your 'ingersh ou' o' my mou'."

"But don't worry, Ms. Miku's Friend," Miki said as she drew back. "I have to admit that I'm a blabber-mouth who couldn't keep a secret if I were the last barista on Earth. But I'm also clinically insane, and so no one will ever believe me."

"That is true," Luka said. "Thank you, Miki. For once, I find your insanity reassuring. And since it seems I can keep no secrets from you, you can stop calling me 'Ms. Miku's Friend'. My name is Luka."

"'Luka Miku's-Friend'," said Miki. "Got it!"

"No, 'Miku's-Friend' is not my last name," Luka said with very little patience. "My name is Luka Megurine, Miki."

"Luka Megurine Miki?" said Miki. "Oh wow! Your last name is the same as my first name!"

Luka lost all hope. Overwhelmed with despair, she did a "face-desk" into the table with a dull thud. "Ouch," she said forlornly into the table.

Miku addressed Miki. "The Chair respectfully requests that the representative from SF-A2 Coffee quit teasing the Chair's girlfriend. And if you want to join our meeting, let's start roll call with you."

Miki saluted smartly. "SF-A2 Beverage Request Fulfillment Technician First Class Miki, not quite fully present and accounted for, but always atcher service!"

Gumi went next. "Gumi Megpoid, part-time secretary and full-time sidekick and 'soopah-genius'. Um, before we continue, I have a question for the Chair."

"This is highly improper," Miku said, "but so am I. Go ahead, Secretary Gumi."

"Can I be 'SEC-uh-tree Gumi' instead of 'sec-rah-TEAR-ee Gumi'?" asked Gumi.

"What's the difference between a 'SEC-uh-tree' and a 'sec-rah-TEAR-ee'?" Miku asked in response.

"There's no difference in meaning that I know of," Gumi said. "But 'SEC-uh-tree' just sounds cool."

Miku sighed. "Please let the meeting notes show that SEC-RAH-TEAR-EE Gumi is a BIG NERD."

Gumi wrote down this dictum faithfully, albeit with an addendum. "Miku: Secretary... Gumi... is a... big... nerd. Gumi: Screw... you. Got it. Sorry, Luka, go ahead."

Luka was still face-desk'ing. "My name is Luka Megurine Miki," she said into the table, "and the entire world and its dog already knows that I am the friendly neighborhood vampire."

"Chin up, Luka," said Miku. "No, seriously. Get your chin up off the table, or else you're gonna get lamination patterns on your face...

"And I, my friends, am the cute little cheerleader, relentless sex machine, and extra-special awesome-sauce known as Miku Hatsune. You may refer to me as 'the Chair' or 'Madam Chairperson', but the preferred nomenclature is 'Your Exalted Magnificence'."

"And she's modest, too," Gumi said dryly.

"Hush, you," said Miku. "...actually, no, don't hush. Secretary Gumi, please read back the minutes from our previous meeting."

Gumi stood up, put on a pair of black-rimmed reading glasses, and held up a blank sheet of paper. "There are no minutes from the previous meeting," she announced, "because there was no previous meeting. This concludes my presentation."

"Thank you, Secretary Gumi," said Miku, as Gumi sat back down. "And by the way, those reading glasses look really hot on you."

"Thank you, Madam Chairperson," Gumi said, "but that's sexual harassment. You'll be hearing from HR and my personal lawyer."

"I regret NOTHING," Miku declared with insensitive glee.

"May I borrow those glasses?" Luka asked. Gumi handed them to Luka, and then Luka modeled them for Miku as well. "What do you think, Miku?"

Miku shuddered with desire. "I think," she said in a lusty voice, "that I've just discovered a new fetish. Please take those off before I drag you up onto the table and take everything else off you."

"Hearing that makes me wonder how many other people have had sex on this table," Miki said thoughtfully, "and whether it's been wiped down since the last time."

Gumi stared at the table for a moment. And then, she gingerly picked up her stack of notebooks and her coffee, and carefully pushed herself away from the table.

"Now that we've completed the pointless roll call and the pointless reading of the non-existent minutes from the non-existent previous meeting," Miku said, "The Chair would like to get started on the first and most important item on this evening's agenda. And that, of course, is me."

"No big surprise there," Gumi said dryly again.

"Wouldn't you be scared if you were told you weren't human, but you didn't know what you were?" asked Miku. "What if I'm in the middle of class or cheerleading, or I'm hanging around with you, and I suddenly sprout a second head, or extra arms, or tentacles, or something."

A deeply disturbing smile came to Gumi's face. "My room-mate might turn into a tentacle monster?" she said. "Ooh, that would be fun."

Luka and Miku slowly turned towards Gumi, and stared at her in abject horror.

"...oops," said Gumi. "I shouldn't have said that out loud, should I?"

"EEUGH!" said a thoroughly repulsed Luka and Miku in perfect unison.

"Don't judge me, alright?" Gumi snapped. "I'm sorry, but I don't think a vampire-loving lesbian and a lesbian-loving vampire are entitled to judge me and my kinks!"

"I've always heard that smart girls are super-freaky in bed," Miku said, "and now I believe it. And by the way, I don't care how much you cry— you're never bunking with me again."

"Hey, Gumi?" asked Miki. "Are you seeing anyone now? 'Cause I know a really nice tentacle monster who's single. He's an older man, but..."

Luka and Miku slowly turned towards Miki, and stared at her in abject horror.

"...WHAT!" said Miki. "It wouldn't be weird! He's not THAT much older than Gumi!"

Miku cleared her throat again. "Getting back to the subject at hand—"

"Please," Luka said. "For the sweet love of all that is good and pure, PLEASE change the subject."

"How much do you know about me?" Miku asked Luka. "And please, tell us everything you know."

"Honestly, I am afraid that I know very little," said Luka. "You have unusual strength and resilience when you are forced to deal with other supernatural entities, such as the elemental and myself. And you feel compelled to sing at times, and you have the power of enthrallment when you sing, but that could be due merely to your beautiful voice and engaging personality.

"However, I am quite sure that you need not worry about extra heads or arms, or... other things. You are surely a 'near-human' entity, or else your condition could not have gone undetected for so long, and I could not draw nourishment from your blood. Indeed, you seem very much like a normal young human woman to me. That is, for outlying values of 'normal'."

"That doesn't help much," Miku said. "Is there anyone else we could ask?"

"I have an idea," Luka said. "Miki? As you have said yourself, you can see things that most others cannot, and you immediately recognized me as a vampire. Could you take a closer look at Miku?"

"Sure!" Miki trotted up to Miku. She narrowed one eye and scowled at Miku in an incredibly cute way. And then, she suddenly reached up, held Miku's face in both hands, and began to twist Miku's head rapidly from side to side.

"What are you doing?" Miku asked.

"Playing with your twin-tails," Miki said. "They make a really neat swirly shape when I do this."

Miku stood back, growled at Miki, and pointed at the empty chair next to Gumi. "QUIT and SIT."

With tearful eyes and a drooping _ahoge_, Miki hung her head and sat down like a scolded child.

"That did not help much either," Luka said. "Hmm... with the Chair's permission, I should like to enlist the services of an outside consultant to resolve this matter. He is also several centuries in age, and he is, to my knowledge, the foremost expert on supernatural flora and fauna in the world. I have not spoken with him in several years, but he would be eager to help me... too eager, in fact. I fear that I have an unusual relationship with him, as well."

"Do you mean he keeps trying to kill you, like that other vampire?" Miku asked worriedly.

"No, not at all," Luka said. "However, he is really, really, really, really annoying."

"The Chair approves." Miku gestured to Miki and Gumi. "I'm used to 'really, really, really, really annoying'."

"HEY!" said Gumi. "Annoying people who live in annoying glass houses shouldn't throw annoying stones!"


	13. Team Meeting 2

This contains adult themes and adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

"Next item on the agenda," said Miku. "The Chair has been thinking about things, and... Well, first, I have another question for you, Luka. At a minimum, how many humans do you need for blood?"

"An interesting question," Luka said. "I actually require a very small amount of blood by volume daily. If my donors were hale and healthy, and if I greatly conserved my energies, I could sustain myself with two humans. And if I had three, all of us could live quite comfortably."

"Assuming Gumi is OK with being Donor Number Two— and we both know she is— and assuming I can find a third donor... would you be OK with that? I know you've been worried about putting other people in danger, and I'm trying to think of ways to reduce your exposure."

Miku rubbed her neck in embarrassment. "And also, the thought of you feeding on other girls makes me crazy jealous, and I was hoping that, at least in a sense, we could 'go steady'. I think I'd be a little less jealous if the other donors were people I knew."

Luka was so touched that she was almost moved to tears. "You would do that for me? You and Gumi?... Yes, I would be very happy with such an arrangement. It takes much time to search for blood, and it would be wonderful if I did not have to search for it."

"In that case," Miku said, "all we need is one more girl."

"It would not necessarily have to be a female—" Luka started to say.

"No, I'm afraid that it would," Miku said quickly. "It absolutely has to be a 'hale and healthy' lady woman female girl person. And I'm afraid that anyone who says otherwise is completely mistaken."

Gumi narrowed her eyes in suspicion at Miku. "Heeeeeeeey waitaminit. You're just using this as an excuse to build your own personal harem, aren't you?"

Miku narrowed her own eyes in response. "Eider o' youse gotta problem wid dat?"

"NO MA'AM," Gumi and Luka said in perfect unison.

"No, seriously," Miku said. "I know I'm being a big hypocrite. If it were the other way around, I'd be insanely jealous. I don't want 'Team Miku' to break up over this."

"As always," Luka said, "I am happy to let you make all these choices. I have yet to regret it. And I have gained a dear friend in Gumi. Perhaps I could gain another."

Gumi smiled. "Yeah, I know I felt threatened by the idea of your having a girlfriend at first, but it's worked out great. Luka is my pal now too. And I'm about as gay-friendly as a straight girl can be, and so either orientation would be OK with me."

"Let's table this discussion for a moment," Miku said, "and tackle the last item, because it's related. Secretary Gumi, this question is for you. Would you be OK with moving off-campus to private housing?"

Gumi blinked. "Um... sure. I don't have a car, and I'd have to get a bicycle right away, or depend on you for rides. But yeah, that'd be OK. Why do you want to move?"

"Two reasons," Miku said. "The first is, our residence hall has bad memories for all three of us, and I'd like to make a change.

"And the other reason is Luka. I'd like to get her off-campus to reduce her exposure further. And besides that, I don't like the idea of my girlfriend sleeping in closets and crawlspaces, or having to sneak in and out of a residence hall, all the time."

Miku turned back to Luka. "How about it, Luka? We've been rushing into this relationship all along, and we might as well keep rushing. Wanna move in together?"

Luka was already softened up by Miku's first offer, and this offer quickly brought her to happy tears. "...yes," she sniffed. "Thank you, Miku. I love you very much."

Miku winked at her. "Love you too. OK, let's do 'business requirements'. We need to find a place with dirt-cheap rent, at least one basement room, and a fourth female room-mate who doesn't mind having her blood sucked every third day. It would actually be better if it's a long ways from campus, or even just out of town, but still within bicycle range. Gumi needs some shelves for her books and her highly toxic chemicals and stuff, and I need more closet space than bedroom for all of my clothes. And it might also be nice if it's a place where I won't get my head stomped for being openly gay."

Gumi whistled. "That's a lot of requirements."

Miki silently counted on her fingers, as if she were working through the list, and then she spoke up. "You could move in with me. I'm pretty sure I've got all of those requirements covered."

"...really?" Miku said in surprise. "I thought you lived with your family."

"No, I'm on my own," Miki said. "I was thinking about selling my family's house and moving into the back room at the coffee-house. But I could keep the house and take boarders instead."

"Wait a minute," Miku said. "Do you mean to say that you live alone, go to school full-time, and run the coffee-house by yourself? How do you find the time to sleep?"

"I have a naturally manic personality," Miki said, "and I have a permanent double-digit 'Blood Caffeine Count'. I haven't slept for more than ninety minutes for years."

"Is that possible?" Luka thought out loud. "Even I am cranky and irritable if I do not get eight hours."

"If you don't mind my asking, Miki," asked Gumi. "Where is your family?"

"They're gone," Miki said.

Gumi gasped. "Oh, Miki! I'm so sorry!"

Miki giggled. "Oh no, Gumi! I didn't mean that they're dead! They're just 'gone'."

"...oh," said Gumi. "Where did they go?"

"Insane," said Miki.

An extremely uncomfortable silence fell over the room.

And then, Miki explained. "When I was a child, after I learned how to talk, my mother couldn't bear the horror of what she had borne and unleashed upon the world, and so she left my father and joined a commune in Canada. Dad did the best he could, but he finally lost it just after I got my driver's license. I can't even visit him at the institution anymore. They told me that I have a bad effect on the other patients."

The extremely uncomfortable silence persisted.

"But don't worry about all that!" Miki said cheerfully. "I'm sure it's only a coincidence that the only two people who ever lived with me are irretrievably insane. I'm sure all three of you would be juuuuust fiiiiine."

"...oh well," Miku said, resigning herself to her possible fate. "Sanity is over-rated. And I'm not exactly a model of mental stability, as it is."

"When one is over three hundred years old," Luka confessed, "one inevitably goes mad, and sane again, several times over. It is a well-trodden path for me."

"And if both of you are going crazy," Gumi said, "you might as well take me with you."

"While 'Team Miku' considers this proposal, the Chair has one more question," Miku said. "And Miki? All joking aside? You don't have to answer this in front of all of us. But you can see that the three of us don't keep secrets from each other, and so I'm gonna go ahead and ask it.

"Miki, are you gay please say yes please say yes?"

Miki replied with a wistful smile. "Sure, I'll answer that question here and now. I'm sorry to disappoint the Chair, but actually, I'm asexual."

A second uncomfortable silence fell over the room. "...ouch," Miku said. "I wasn't expecting that bombshell. I'm sorry, Miki. Um... should I say 'I'm sorry'?"

"You can if you want," Miki said casually, "but really, it's no big deal. I don't miss what I've never had."

"Is it a medical problem?" Gumi asked carefully. "Maybe you could get some kind of treatment for that."

"Dunno," said Miki. "When I first realized it, I thought about asking a doctor about it. But I don't think I'd want to try to change it. It'd be like... sorry, Miku, but it'd be like your trying not to be gay.

"And anyway, it's really for the best. If I were physically attracted to anyone, I'd just be lonely, 'cause no one will ever love a weirdo like me."

A third stunned silence in as many minutes fell over the room.

Miku finally broke the silence again. "*_ahem_* The Chair respectfully requests that the representative from SF-A2 Coffee present her person to the Chair for a hug."

"'kay," said Miki. She trotted around the table, and let herself be hugged fiercely by the taller Miku.

"If anybody can love you, I can," Miku said confidently. "And it can be any kind of love you want, Miki. 'Gay' is my specialty, but Gumi can tell you that I'm pretty good at 'friend like family' love too."

"Miku's 'friend like family' flavored love is highly recommended," Gumi said with a smile and eyes not without tears.

Overwhelmed with emotion, Miki remained silent for once. She clutched at Miku like a lost child reunited with her parent.

Miku looked back up at Gumi and Luka. "The Chair has her hands full, but let's put this motion to a vote. All those in favor of relocating our main office and merging our operations with SF-A2 Coffee?"

"AYE," said Gumi, Luka and Miku herself.

"Opposed?" asked Miku.

Silence.

"The motion is passed unanimously. Well, that is, if my father agrees to it too. But my grades are good, and this should save him money on room and board... I believe that's everything on this evening's agenda. Do I have a second to adjourn?"

"One-thousand one," Miki said into Miku's shoulder. "But you can have longer than a second."

"...yeah, I walked right into that one," Miku said with a smile. "Meeting adjourned. Gumi, since you have an early class tomorrow, why don't you and our room-mate-to-be head out now? Me and the 'night owl' can clean up here."

"Thanks." Gumi held a friendly arm around Miki's shoulders, and walked with her towards the door. "Can I stop by the coffee-house tomorrow, Miki? Since Miku knows you better than I do, we have some catching up to do. And I don't actually know much about coffee, besides the 'varnish remover' in the library lounge vending machine. Maybe you could show me what you've got."

"Sure, Gumi," said Miki happily. "I'd like that."

"And maybe you could also tell me about that tentacle monster," Gumi asked hopefully. "I don't care whether he's real or not. Just be sure to go into lots of detail."

"No problem," said Miki. "It'll be fun to talk to someone who's even weirder than I am for a change."

Miku closed the meeting-room door after them, and then gave Luka a sly look. "We still have this room reserved for another full hour," Miku said. "And it'd be a shame to let all this privacy go to waste."

"Then let us make good use of it," said Luka, giving her lover a sly look in return. "I am ready for love at any time and any place with you, Miku."

"Awesome," said Miku. "Is it OK if I 'set the agenda' of this 'meeting' too? I know you 'like it' when I take the lead, but I still want your consent."

"Thank you for being so considerate, Miku," said Luka. "You have my consent. You may ask anything of me. I can never say no to you."

"Double awesome." Miku held out Gumi's reading glasses in one hand, and pointed at the table with the other. "NAKED. GLASSES. TABLE. NOW."

"But Miku," said a smiling Luka, as she obediently began to disrobe. "I thought you did not want for me to have lamination patterns on my skin."

"Just not on your face," Miku said. "I never said anything about your back."


	14. Moving In

This takes place a week or two after the previous chapter.

This contains adult themes and adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

Miku parked her car in the driveway next to Miki's house at the edge of the city on a beautiful late-autumn Saturday morning. "Here we are, Luka," she said to her passenger.

Luka had learned how to work her seat belt and car door. She let herself out and walked around Miku's car, wearing her face-mask and sunglasses, and carrying a large black duffel-bag.

Miku locked her car, and then eyed the duffel-bag. "Is that really everything that you own?" she asked. "I had to make four trips just to move what I brought with me to the residence hall."

"Yes," said Luka. "I have no need for possessions, besides a few changes of clothes. And I have no money, and so I must steal what I need, or rummage through the trash until I find it."

"Oh, Luka!" said Miku. "I am SO taking you shopping next weekend."

"There is no need to pamper me," Luka said, "especially since you and Gumi would not even let me help you move here."

"You helped us pack, back at the residence hall," Miku said, "and I wanted to bring you here after Gumi and I were all set and ready to party. Just let your friends spoil you for awhile, OK?"

"Very well." Luka looked around as she and Miku walked to the front door. "Miki's house is actually quite large, especially for a small person like Miki. And it looks like the yard is spacious as well."

"Yeah," Miku agreed, "and it's in good shape. It's definitely not the ramshackle gothic mansion I was expecting. Either Miki's father left her debt-free, or else there's a lot more money in coffee than I first thought."

Miku let herself in and walked a distance into the house, and then realised that Luka still stood outside. "Whatcha waitin' for," she called back, "a personal invitation?"

"Yes," Luka said, a bit sadly. "Vampires require an explicit invitation to enter a private residence."

"Aw, nuts," said Miku. "I'm sorry, Luka. I feel like I've locked out the family kitten. Please come in."

"Thank you, Miku. No harm is done." Luka let herself in, just as Miki called up from the basement. "Is that Luka? C'mon down! Your Subterranean Lair Of Doom awaits!"

Luka followed Miku through a hallway, down a set of carpeted steps, and into a large central basement room, to meet with Miki. The full-sized basement was partitioned into two small bedrooms on one side and a wide utility area with washer and dryer on the other side. The central room featured a comfortably worn sofa, a medium-sized television standing on a small cabinet, Miku's recently moved mini-fridge, and a large desk in a far corner.

Miki gestured to the closest bedroom. "Luka, we thought you'd like this bedroom. The other bedroom has an open ground-level window, and so Miku took it for herself."

Miku looked at Luka with concern. "Are you OK?"

After pulling off her mask and sunglasses, Luka rubbed at her eyes. "I am overwhelmed. I did not think that I would ever have a bedroom again. I almost feel human."

Miku gave her a hug. "Now I feel selfish and shallow. All I've been able to think about is the different places and positions in which we can 'get our freak on' down here."

Luka giggled. "Perhaps you should not talk of such things in front of our landlord."

"Oh, I don't mind," Miki said. "Gumi and I are upstairs, and the basement is all yours. 'And it harm none, do what you will.' But maybe you could lock the basement door, or put a note on the door, while you're using your whips and chains and 'implements of perversion' on each other."

"Understood," Miku said, as if she actually had such items to use on her girlfriend.

Luka gulped. "Sometimes you frighten me, Miku. But in a pleasantly exciting way. I think."

Miku noticed a computer on the desk in the corner of the open area. "Is that computer hooked up to the Internet?" she asked.

"Yup!" said Miki. "It's an old PC, but it's good enough for researching all those positions you want to try out. And it'll give Luka something to read when she's alone."

"Is reading the Internet an enjoyable way to pass the time?" Luka asked innocently.

"Oh wow," Miku said. "You really are out of touch, Luka. You have so much to learn."

"Indeed I do," Luka said solemnly. "I shall have to learn enough to get a job to pay my rent."

Miku and Miki looked at each other in surprise. "You don't have to do that, Luka!" said Miki. "Miku and Gumi's rent easily covers you too. And you're our guest of honor."

"Oh, but I insist," Luka said. "I am grateful for the kindness that you have already shown me. But I simply must pay for my own keep, even if it is only a token amount."

"Hmm..." Miki said. "I could use a part-time dishwasher and errand girl at the coffee-house. You could stay 'undocumented' and work for rent and some pocket-money."

Luka blinked. "...are you sure, Miki? It would be wonderful if I could both live and work in secrecy. But I feel as if I am already imposing on you."

"There's always work to do," Miki said. "And it would be nice to have someone to talk to during slow times. I usually scare away my help when I try to chat with them."

Luka was almost moved to tears again. "I am so grateful for your kindness and generosity. I thank the Maker that I met Miku, and then Gumi, and then you too, Miki."

"I never thought I'd hear someone be grateful for the chance to wash dishes," Miku said. She sensed an opportunity for a group hug with Luka and Miki, and took it.

After a moment, Miku stood back and spoke again. "By the way, where's Gumi? I hope we'll have lots of hugs, but I hate for that big nerd to miss out on any of them."

"She's making a picnic lunch for you and me," Miki said. "She's already made big bowls of potato salad and carrot salad, and she's gonna cook some brats on my grill—"

"WHAT?" Miku gasped. "You let GUMI near a GRILL?"

"Um... yes?" said Miki, as Miku turned and bolted. "But I suddenly have a feeling that was a terrible mistake."

Miku raced up the steps, through Miki's house, into the kitchen, and through its open sliding patio doors into the back yard, to see Gumi dump a full bag of charcoal briquettes into an already-full grill.

"Um, Gumi-bear? Sweetie?" said a worried Miku. "Don't you think that's enough briquettes?"

"No," Gumi said, "but this is all that Miki has." She held a huge can of lighter fluid upside-down in both hands, and began to drench the briquettes with reckless abandon.

"GUMI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! GUMI! STAHP!" Miku tried to take the lighter fluid away from Gumi. "At least let Luka spend one night in this house before you burn it down!"

Gumi held the lighter fluid above her head and away from Miku. "FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS!" she shouted with righteous Nerd Rage.

Luka had followed Miku up to the open patio doors, putting on her face-mask and sunglasses and pulling up her hood again. "Problem?" she asked Miku from the doorway.

"Luka! You're just in time to save us all!" said a frantic Miku. "Please take that lighter fluid away from this firebug, and then take her away from the grill! I'll take over here."

Luka effortlessly held a struggling Gumi in a gentle bear hug with her vampiric strength. "Gumi's major is chemical engineering," she asked Miku. "If this is how she behaves, should we not be concerned for our own safety in general?"

"Nah," said Miku, as she carefully removed briquettes from the grill and returned them to the empty bag. "She's always been good in class. She's only scary with large open fires. I think her family let her play with matches as a child."

Gumi desperately reached out towards the grill as Luka dragged her back into the house. "NOOOO!" Gumi wailed. "THE FIRE IS MY MISTRESS! I MUST HEED HER CALL!..."

* * *

After Miku had grilled a platter of burgers and brats over a greatly reduced fire, the four friends sat down at Miki's kitchen table to enjoy a picnic-style lunch.

Miku shoveled a heaping tablespoon of potato salad into her mouth. "Awesome grub, Gumi-bear. The spring onions in this potato salad are simply exquisite."

"Thanks." Gumi glanced at Luka, who was nursing a large glass of unsweetened iced tea. "I wish our guest of honor could enjoy it too."

"Ooh! I'll be Luka's lunch! Hang on..." Miki stuffed the remaining half of her brat into her mouth, and then stood up from the table.

"I do not have to feed right now, Miki," said Luka. "You should take your time and enjoy your lunch with Miku and Gumi."

Miki was unable to answer. She had stuffed her mouth so full that she had trouble chewing. She silently gestured, and then danced in place in frustration.

"On the other hand," Miku said with a grin, "this is an entertaining show."

Miki finally swallowed her food. "NNNGH! I HATE it when I do that... That's OK, Luka. That's enough for me. And we decided that I would 'go first' with you."

Without warning, she pushed herself between the seated Luka and the kitchen table, and then sat in Luka's lap. Although Luka was only of average height, Miki looked like a child in her lap.

"Your sitting in Luka's lap while she feeds on you is both cute and creepy," Miku said to Miki. "I'll try not to pummel you severely in a fit of jealousy for cuddling with my girlfriend without asking."

"Thanks!" Miki unbuttoned her blouse to reveal a modest tank-top. "Soup's on, Luka."

Luka raised an eyebrow. "Are you comfortable with doing this for the first time in front of your friends?"

"Sure!" Miki said. "I like how open you all are with each other, and I wanna play too. And really, it's no big deal. We all know that life 'sucks' in general anyway."

"If you're OK with it, Luka, go ahead," said Miku. "I want to see how the 'consent effect' works on someone like Miki."

"Very well. Thank you, Miki." As usual, Luka briefly nuzzled Miki's lower neck, and then she bit down and began to feed. But unlike Miku and Gumi, Miki didn't flinch.

"Didn't that hurt?" Gumi asked Miki.

"I work with hot and sharp things all the time," Miki said proudly, "and I work in customer service. I've built up a thick skin and an extremely high pain threshold."

"Are you feeling anything unusual?" Miku asked eagerly.

"No, not really. Should I?" But then, Miki unexpectedly yawned. "Actually, I do feel nice and relaxed, all of a sudden... Oh wow. I can hardly keep my... eyes open."

Just as Luka finished and sat up straight, Miki slumped against her. Miku and Gumi stood up in alarm. "Is she alright?" Gumi asked.

Luka felt for Miki's pulse. "Yes. She is only sleeping. She sleeps very little, and apparently, sleep is her greatest physical pleasure."

"Just look at her face," Gumi said. "She's always cheerful, but always so intense. I've never seen her look so relaxed and at peace."

"Neither have I," Miku agreed. "Congratulations, Luka. The 'consent effect' remains undefeated."

Luka stood up, carefully gathering Miki up in her arms. "I shall put her to bed. Which room is hers?"

"Second door on the left." Miku watched Luka walk away. "This is so cool, Gumi. This is gonna 'work'."

"I never had any doubt," Gumi said proudly. "You're a highly effective 'team leader'."

Just as Luka returned, the three friends heard a knock at the front door. "Was Miki expecting someone else?" Luka asked.

"She didn't say anything to us," Miku said.

"You and Gumi should enjoy your lunch." Luka turned away again. "I shall answer the door, since I am already up."

"Aren't you going to put on your mask and sunglasses?" Miku asked after her.

"Thank you, Miku," said Luka, "but I should not need them as long as I remain within the house."

Luka walked up to Miki's front door and opened it confidently— but when she saw who was there, she froze in abject horror.

"Oh NO," Luka said out loud.


	15. The Consultant 1

Here's the big "reveal" on Miku. This is a bit earlier than I first planned, but I wanted to reveal it before I took a break from this story.

This contains adult themes and adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

A tall man with very long purple hair stood at the door. He wore a long white coat that vaguely resembled a samurai's kimono, and he carried a briefcase in one hand and an antique doctor's satchel in the other.

As soon as he saw Luka's face, his own face lit up in utter joy. He set down his briefcase and satchel... and then, he went down on one knee in the doorway. "LUKA!" he shouted eagerly. "WILL YOU MARRY ME?"

Luka answered him indirectly by slamming the door shut in his face. Ignoring the sounds of his crying out in pain and falling flat on his back, she stomped back to the kitchen.

Miku and Gumi stared at her blankly as she sat down at the kitchen table, slumped forward, and held her face in her hands. "I am sorry," she said, "but I will have to ask one of you to answer the door, after all. It is too much for me to bear."

Miku and Gumi looked at each other, and then Gumi stood up. "I'll get it," she said. "You stay here, and... um... do something with Luka."

Gumi walked up to the front door and opened it, and found the man sprawled flat on his back, but still grinning like an idiot. "Um, sir?" Gumi asked nervously. "Are you alright?"

The man raised his head and winked at her. "I would say that 'only my pride is wounded'... but fortunately for me, I have no pride!"

"...I see." Gumi held out her hand. "Can I help you up? Pride or no, that position doesn't look very comfortable."

"Thank you, miss." Pulling only slightly on Gumi's hand, the man sprung to his feet, as though he were quite athletic, and then brushed the dust and grass from his coat. "Pardon me for not introducing myself. My name is Gakupo Kamui. Your friend Luka asked me to help you with a certain personal matter."

Gumi frowned in thought until she figured it out. "Oh!" she said. "You must be the 'consultant' that Luka mentioned. Sorry, but I'm not Miku— I'm her friend Gumi. But yes, please come in."

After setting his briefcase and satchel down in the living room, Gakupo followed Gumi into the kitchen, to see Miku standing over Luka with one hand on her shoulder.

"This is Miku, sir," Gumi said to Gakupo, "and I believe you already know Luka."

"Is something wrong, Luka?" asked Gakupo innocently. "And will you marry me?"

"YES and NO!" Luka shouted, causing Miku to jump in surprise. "I know I foolishly asked you to come, but WHY are you HERE?"

"I was on my way towards the college," Gakupo said, "but when I drove past this house, my 'samurai sense' began to tingle."

"If you have a strange tingling sensation, see a doctor about it!" Luka snapped. "Why did you not call to ask if we had moved yet, or at least to let us know you were coming today?"

"I was afraid that, if I let you know exactly when I was coming, you wouldn't even answer the door at all, let alone slam it in my face," Gakupo said. "By the way, will you marry me?"

"NO!" Luka shrieked.

Miku frowned at Gakupo. "Thank you for coming to see me," she said, "but please stop trying to marry my girlfriend."

"Pleased to meet you, miss." Gakupo held out his hand— and froze. "Sorry— did you say 'girlfriend'? Luka failed to mention that."

Miku shook his hand proudly. "Indeed I did," she said smugly. "Luka swings both ways, and she swung over to the other team for me."

Gakupo's eyes widened. Staring at Miku and Luka, he held a hand over his mouth, as if he were trying not to have a massive nosebleed.

"Um, sir?" Gumi asked again. "Are you alright?"

"Don't worry, Gumi," said Miku. "Assuming he's a typical heterosexual man, and knowing that he's in love with Luka, he's imagining me and Luka having hot lesbian sex right now."

"...oh," said Gumi. "Of course. Duh. And also, eww."

"...pardon my surprise," Gakupo said quietly. "Luka has refused my advances for nearly two hundred years, and I did not expect her to give her heart to another of any gender..."

But then, he grinned again. "But you seem like a lovely woman as well, Miss Miku! If you also love Luka, let's ALL THREE of us get married! Luka and Miku, will you marry me?"

Luka did a "face-desk" into the kitchen table. "That is BIGAMY, you incomprehensibly idiotic person!" she cried into the table.

Gakupo gestured to himself with very little modesty. "Yes, and it is 'big-of-ME' too! Miss Gumi, would you like to marry all of us as well?"

Miku suddenly felt another typical Miku-esque twinge of jealousy. "Hey! This is my harem of loveable social outcasts! Get yer own, bitch."

Gakupo froze in surprise for a second time. "Do you also mean to say that you are the dominant partner in your relationship with Luka?"

"I'm not sure exactly what I am," Miku said with very little modesty of her own, "but I do know that I'm a RELENTLESS SEX MACHINE."

"Oh, Luka! I'm BEGGING you!" Gakupo cried. "PLEASE let me marry you and Miku! I'll become Miku's love slave too! I'm OK with that!"

"NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!" Luka wailed, beating her head against the table in time with her repeated refusals. "And also, NO!"

"I know you asked him to stop proposing," Gumi said to Miku, "but you do have to admire his persistence."

"NO you do NOT!" Luka said sternly. "You do not have to admire it at all! There is nothing about it that is even remotely admirable!"

"Luka, please!" Gumi said sternly in response. "Mr. Kamui came all the way here to help Miku. Sir, can I get you something to drink?"

"Just Gakupo will do, Miss Gumi. And actually..." Gakupo eyed the half-full platter of grilled brats and burgers. "Could I impose on you for a bite to eat? I have not yet had lunch, myself."

"Of course!" Gumi said sweetly. "And just Gumi is fine, too. Let me fix a plate for you and warm it up in the microwave—"

"Do not FEED it!" Luka shouted, referring to Gakupo as if he were a stray animal. "If you feed it, it might never leave!"

* * *

Some time later, Gakupo dabbed at his mouth with a napkin, and then stood up from the kitchen table. "Thank you again, Gumi. If you and Miku are also done, let us adjourn to your sitting room and investigate the mystery that is Miku."

Miku reluctantly followed him into Miki's living room. "Um, will this be a full-blown medical examination?" she asked. "I get naked in front of Luka and Gumi all the time, but I've only just met you."

"You may remain fully clothed for my examination," Gakupo said, as he opened his briefcase, "but if you prefer to be nude in general, I certainly have no objections."

"Luka, I'm beginning to share your opinion of this guy." Miku watched Gakupo open and start up a laptop computer in his briefcase, and then reach into his doctor's satchel and set out an array of strange antique medical instruments. "Wow. You've got all kinds of toys."

"I employ both the most ancient of sciences and the latest technologies," Gakupo said. "Hold still, please." He picked up each instrument in turn, and held it against Miku's head and body, as if he were taking measurements with it. "Hmm... There definitely is something."

He returned the instruments to his bag, tapped a few numbers into his laptop, and then pulled out a tangle of wires and sensors. "A quick exophenotype electroencephalomyography should give us the answer."

"That sounds like something Miki would say." Miku crossed her eyes to watch Gakupo stick the sensors on her head and face. "Um, Gakupo? I'm willing to experiment with electricity, but I'd rather do it with Luka."

"You are a most pleasingly perverted young lady," Gakupo said with a grin. "These sensors are not powered. But I must ask you not to think about doing such things with Luka. The impulses from mental activity of that nature might overload my equipment."

After applying the remaining sensors to Miku's arms, Gakupo plugged the other end of the sensors' cable into a small box connected to his laptop. "Here we go," he said. He adjusted a few controls on the box, checked his laptop's screen— and gasped.

Miku grimaced. "That doesn't sound good."

"Please remain still, Miku." Gakupo continued to adjust controls while typing one-handed at the laptop with impressive speed. "I've never seen readings like these before! But have no fear, Miku. I believe I have good news for you. I only need to confirm it."

He turned back and began to remove the sensors from Miku's skin. "I must ask you to allow me to perform a few more simple tests," Gakupo said, "to confirm Luka's findings and my own hypothesis."

Miku winced as each sensor was peeled away. "Ow. Ow. Ow. What kind of. Ow. Tests. Ow. Gakupo? Ow."

"First, this." Without warning, Gakupo produced what looked like a large knife, and swung it towards Miku. But Miku easily caught the blade flat between her hands without thinking.

Gumi gasped, and Luka shouted angrily. "GAKUPO! Was that necessary?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so. My apologies, Luka. I had to test Miku's reflexes. But don't worry. It was only a parlor trick." Gakupo crumpled up the "knife," revealing it to be made of paper.

And then, Gakupo rested a hand on Miku's shoulder. "Forgive me, Miku. I mean you no harm. And I promise that I won't do anything like that again."

Miku breathed out heavily. "OK. Yeah, Luka said that I had quick reflexes around other... wait a minute. What are you, Gakupo? Are you a supernatural something or other yourself?"

"Me?" Gakupo said with a modest smile. "No, I am nothing special... merely your run-of-the-mill immortal samurai. But this is about you, not me."

Next, Gakupo held up a large tuning fork and tapped it. "This test should be much less stressful. Please sing this note to me for a few seconds."

Miku sang the note with perfect pitch, and then she saw that Gakupo was already enthralled by her voice. "Gotcha," she said with amusement.

Gakupo shook his head to clear it. "Indeed you did... I must ask for only one more test. Please kiss Luka."

"WHAT?" Luka shouted. "What does that have to do with determining Miku's true nature?"

"Nothing at all," Gakupo admitted. "I just want to watch Miku kiss you."

Luka face-palmed. "OH, for the LOVE of!..."

"Luka?" said Miku. "It makes me sad to think you would ever refuse to kiss me. I don't care if a pervert wants to watch us or not."

Luka blinked. "...you are serious? Very well. Gakupo, after this, I owe you no favors for examining Miku."

She walked up to Miku, held Miku's shoulders, and kissed Miku passionately. Miku reached up and held Luka's face as they kissed.

And then, Luka stood up again. "I hope you enjoyed that, Gakupo... Er... are you alright?"

Gakupo brushed manly tears from his eyes. "No, Luka, I am not alright. And no, I did not enjoy that at all. That had nothing to do with Miku's identity, but it was still a test. I wanted to see if there was true love in your kiss... and there was."

He reached out, held both Luka's and Miku's hands and pressed them together. "I have lost, Miku. You have won. I had hoped for almost two centuries that Luka might change her mind and love me, but to no avail. You have won her heart."

And then, he addressed Luka. "You have my best wishes and my apologies. I won't trouble you again with my foolish proposals."

Luka was touched by Gakupo's sudden sincerity. "Oh, Gakupo!... I suppose it is still acceptable to flirt with me from time to time."

Gakupo grinned again. "I'm sure I can find other ways to be annoying... But as for the matter at hand?

"Congratulations, Miku. You're a siren."


	16. The Consultant 2

This contains adult themes and adult humor. Reader discretion is advised.

* * *

"...a siren?" Miku said. "Oh wow. That's... that's..."

And then, she turned to Gumi. "Help me out here, 'brains'. All I'm coming up with is the red and blue thing on a police car that goes WHOO WHOO WHOO."

"I'm no expert in mythology," Gumi said modestly. "But the sirens were beautiful women who lived on small rocky islands and lured sailors to their deaths with enchanting music."

"Top of the class," Gakupo said. "Some legends described them as half-bird, half-human, with the wings or the legs of a bird, but that is obviously untrue."

Miku scowled at Gumi. "I don't want to hear one word from you about my skinny legs."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Gumi said with a grin. "But now we know where your 'entrancement' ability came from. Remind me never to get in a boat with you."

"What about her ability to defend herself against other supernatural creatures?" Luka asked. "She is the only entity who has ever successfully resisted me."

"The legends claim that sirens were the daughters of a god and a muse," Gakupo said. "A lineage of that nature suggests many superhuman abilities, and that would be one of them."

"Does that mean that Miku is immortal, like Luka?" asked Gumi.

"It seems likely," Gakupo said. "Being the child of a god in legend usually suggests immortality, and my own tests indicate a dramatically extended lifespan."

"Hear that, Luka?" said Miku. "I had already worried about how I'd have to grow old and die, and leave you alone again. But it sounds like you might be stuck with me for quite awhile instead."

"I would be happy to be stuck with you, Miku," said Luka. "I do not think anything would make me happier than to have you by my side forever."

As Luka and Miku embraced, Gakupo turned to Gumi. "I am glad for them, but do these displays of affection not become tiresome after awhile?"

"You get used to it," Gumi said. "And besides, weren't you just repeatedly proposing to Luka yourself?"

"Touché," said Gakupo.

"I still have a question," Miku said. "I always knew I was a special little snowflake, but I still don't understand how any of this is possible in the first place."

"I am intrigued by this as well," Gakupo said. "There were never more than a few sirens in all of mythological history, and according to all of my references, they became extinct centuries ago."

"Isn't it obvious?" Gumi asked Miku. "You were adopted, after all."

"Yeah..." Miku said slowly.

"And wasn't your father in the military? And I think you said that he served in southern Europe for awhile, doing top-secret intelligence work."

"Yeah..." Miku said again.

"And didn't he retire from the military right around the time that he and your mother adopted you?"

"Yeah," a confused Miku said, "but I still don't..."

"Don't worry," Gumi said to Gakupo and Luka. "She'll put it all together pretty soon."

Miku's face suddenly lit up. "OHHHH!"

"NOW she's got it," Gumi said proudly.

"I think my father and I need to have a little talk," Miku thought out loud. "But this time, he's the one who's got some explaining to do."

And then, a still-sleepy Miki walked into the room, having finally awoken after Luka's feeding. "Who's the samurai?" she asked casually.

Gakupo glanced at her, and raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I didn't know you also had a natural-born adept about the place."

"HEY!" said Miku. "Why did I have to go through all those weird tests, if you can tell instantly that Miki is supernatural too?"

"Excuse me for never meeting a siren before!" Gakupo said indignantly. "Sirens are more rare than adepts and vampires put together!"

Gumi repeated this silently to herself, and then raised a hand for attention. "Um, sir? Math doesn't work like that."

"What's an adept?" Miki asked Gakupo.

"An adept walks in eternity," Gakupo said reverently. "She does not see all— apparently, you didn't know Miku was a siren— but she can see many things that mortals cannot see. And she has a natural proclivity for the mystic arts. You could become the most powerful of all of us."

"Does this mean that all those visions and hallucinations I see are real, after all?" asked Miki. "The maddening geometries folded into the skies, and the desolate gray wastelands of the outer dimensions, and the brutal infinities of nothingness that lie beyond? All that stuff is real?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so," said Gakupo. "You bear a heavy burden— one that will surely drive you insane."

"Actually, I'm way ahead of you." Miki held up a closed fist, and Gakupo obliged her with a "fist-bump."

"Adepts are far beyond my own field of knowledge. But please call me later. I can introduce you to good people who can help you." Gakupo handed a business card to Miki, and then shut down his laptop and began to pack up. "This has been a most productive afternoon, but I believe my work here is done."

Gumi raised a hand for attention again. "Gakupo? Before you go? Am I... something special too?"

"Of course," Gakupo said, "You are an especially intelligent, kind and lovely young mortal woman."

"...oh," said Gumi. "OK..." She suddenly hung her head and began to cry.

Gakupo turned back to the others in a panic. "I'm sorry!" he said. "I though I let her down gently!"

"C'mon, Gumi-bear!" said Miku. "I'm still your best friend, you know! Just because I'm not who I thought I was, that doesn't mean I'm not who I still am! Um, I think."

"We are all still your friends," Luka agreed. "This changes nothing between you and I, and as Miku tried to say, it also changes nothing between you and her or Miki."

"And no one actually lives forever," Miki said. "Even if we survive the demise of this planet's sun, there's no escaping the eventual heat death of the entire universe."

"It's still not fair!" Gumi cried. "You three get to be together, and have fun, and love each other, for thousands of years! But I have to grow old and die! It's not fair!"

An uncomfortable silence fell over the room. The only sound was of Gumi's sniffling and sobbing.

Luka finally broke the silence. "...Gumi? If you truly desire immortality? I can share it with you."

"Do you mean that you could turn me into a vampire?" Gumi asked through her tears.

"Yes," Luka said. "I have never done this thing, and I meant never to do it. But if immortality for the sake of love and friendship is your heart's true desire, I will do it.

"However, this is not a decision to be made lightly. Turning is utterly irreversible, and it would be a traumatic experience for both of us. It would be even worse than after we fought the elemental."

"What do you mean?" Gumi asked.

"A human cannot be turned into a vampire while she still lives," Luka said. "To begin with, I would have to kill you."

"Ooh," said Gumi, forgetting her tears. "No, I don't like the sound of that at all."

Gakupo cleared his throat. "Perhaps I should make an offer I have never made before, as well. I have thought of doing this for some time, and if you are Luka's friend, you are a worthy candidate.

"There are at least three paths to immortality. You can be born with it, as with Miku and Miki. You can have it thrust upon you, as with Luka. Or... you can make your own path."

"...you have my attention," Gumi said carefully.

"What is your field of study?" Gakupo asked hopefully.

"Chemical engineering will be my first doctorate," Gumi said.

"Excellent," said Gakupo. "Then you are a scholar, as well. Have you had any lessons in biochemistry?"

"Yes, I've had some biochemistry in high school, and in my first semester of classes here," Gumi said.

"Capital," said Gakupo. "What have you learned about genetics?"

Gumi frowned. "Not much... besides high-school honors biology, all the books in the high school library, and a couple of textbooks that I found lying around here at college and read for fun."

Gakupo smiled wryly. "That is a start." He offered a second business card to Gumi. "Please e-mail your curriculum to me, and I'll choose the best classes for you. I can also look up the college library catalog and send you a reading list. And then, I can loan you additional texts from my private library that you will not find anywhere else."

Gumi accepted the card. "Thank you," she said, "but what is all this about?"

"I am self-taught in both ancient and modern sciences related to supernatural biology," Gakupo said. "And I have applied that knowledge with great success, if I do say so myself. I spoke the truth when I told Miku that I am merely human, yet immortal. I am, in fact, a self-made immortal.

"It was not easy. I enjoyed none of the benefits of accumulated research and medical technology that you have available to you now. In fact, I was over eighty years old and nearly on my own death-bed before I achieved immortality for myself. It took several more decades of work to reverse my aging process, and to restore my youth and vigor.

"But, as Miki said, no one actually lives forever. And while my knowledge is obviously not suitable for the general public, I have often thought it would be a shame if I were to perish in an accident, and if everything that I had learned perished with me. I'd like to make you my protégé.

"This will not be an easy path, Gumi. It is not without its own dangers. And your key to immortality will be as unique as your own genetic code, and you must find it yourself. However, with my help, I expect you can make yourself immortal, and preserve your body at a permanent physical age of twenty-one years, even before you earn that first doctorate."

Gumi's eyes were wide as saucers. "How can I ever thank you for this?" she asked quietly.

"Well—" Gakupo started to say.

Luka growled. "Careful, Gakupo. I won't let you take advantage of her. Gumi is a good girl."

"Luka, please!" Gakupo said indignantly. "She's too young for me, by an order of magnitude! I started to say that I might ask only for your companionship, and perhaps the occasional home-cooked meal, such as I enjoyed today. I have no living family— and now, no romantic prospects— and the greatest curse of immortality is loneliness. I know that we have only just met, but perhaps I could come to think of you as my younger sister."

Gumi walked up to Gakupo and hugged him. "Something like this?" she asked.

Gakupo patted her shoulder. "Yes," he said happily, "this would do quite nicely."

* * *

Gakupo stood at the front door, but paused to say his goodbyes. "It was wonderful to see you again, Luka, and to meet your young friends. I know we haven't kept in touch, but perhaps I could visit more often."

"That depends on how annoying you intend to be," Luka said with an indulgent smile. "Are you sure you won't stay longer? Miki has plenty of room."

"Thank you," Gakupo said, "but I have other previous engagements. I'm going to stop by and see 'Big Al' and Ann while I'm in this part of the world."

"Oh? How is Prometheus?" Luka asked. "It has been some time since I saw him and his bride."

"They were both well, the last I heard," Gakupo said. "I'll let them know you asked after them. Miki and Gumi, we'll talk again soon. And Miku, take care of Luka. She's tougher than she looks, but she still needs love."

"Will do," Miku said. "Thanks for everything."

After Gakupo drove away, Miku closed the door and breathed out heavily. "Wow. A few hours ago, we were three college students and a vampire. But now we're, like, the Supernatural Action Squad."

"Sort of," Gumi said. "We're a vampire, a siren, an adept, and a plain old me."

"Not for long," Miki said. "After you become immortal, I bet you can give yourself lots of scary Science Powers. And you're so smart, it's like you already have a superpower."

"Miki's right," Miku said proudly. "You're not just any big nerd. You're the nerdiest nerd who ever nerded in the history of all nerd-dom."

Gumi giggled. "I suppose I can't deny my own true nature."


End file.
